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Trailer Snark (June 30, 2017 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Eric from View from Above, Robert from Cards and Counters, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Despicable Me 3 (Universal) –  Family/Animation
Rated PG for action and rude humor
Tag Line: Hard time ahead.
Starring: Steve Carell, Kristen Wiig
Plot: Gru meets his long-lost charming, cheerful, and more successful twin brother Dru who wants to team up with him for one last criminal heist.
Running Time: 90 minutes

Chris: “You’re despicable”….yes, that was animated entertainment.  If you don’t know the reference, you are too young.
Jim: These movies are hilarious and great for families to watch. Seeing it today. Gotta love the minions.

The House (Warner Bros) – Comedy
Rated R for language throughout, sexual references, drug use, some violence and brief nudity.
Tag Line: If you can’t beat the house, be… The House.
Starring: Will Ferrell, Amy Poehler
Plot: A dad convinces his friends to start an illegal casino in his basement after he and his wife spend their daughter’s college fund.
Running Time: 88 minutes

Jim: A great cast and premise—-this week is looking good.
Chris: Amusing concept.  Will Ferrell movies tend to be pretty good, so I am intrigued.  How far would you go to send your kid to college?  Definitely not this far.

Baby Driver (TriStar Pictures) – Action
Rated R for Violence, Language, and Adult Situations.
Tag Line: All you need is one killer track.
Starring: Ansel Elgort, Jamie Fox, Jon Bernthal, Jon Hamm, Kevin Spacey
Plot: After being coerced into working for a crime boss, a young getaway driver finds himself taking part in a heist doomed to fail.
Running Time: 113 minutes

Chris: Hey, Frank Castle sighting!  Other than that, I am not too interested in this one.  It will probably be worth a rainy night rental.
Jim: Good trailer #3. Over the top, mind-numbing action—it must be summertime. And with Edgar Wright, director of Shaun of the Dead and Scott Pilgrim vs. the World “at the wheel.”

You can read our very own Dope Sheet Review of Baby Driver here!

The Little Hours (Gunpowder & Sky) – Comedy/Romance
Rated R for graphic nudity, sexual content and language
Tag Line: None
Starring: Aubrey Plaza, Alison Brie, Dave Franco, John C. Reilly
Plot: A young servant fleeing from his master takes refuge at a convent full of emotionally unstable nuns in the Middle Ages. Introduced as a deaf blind man, he must fight to hold his cover as the nuns try to resist temptation.
Running Time: 90 minutes

Jim: What the…? Sheesh. I love Aubrey Plaza.
Chris: I almost feel ashamed to say it, but Aubrey Plaza may have found the perfect role.  Looks funny as all heck.

Tickets Purchased:  Two for The Little Hours (Jim and Chris) and One for Despicable Me (Jim)

Aubrey Plaza Goes All Out Nun Ratchet in "The Little Hours"
Aubrey Plaza Goes All Out Nun Ratchet in “The Little Hours”
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Trailer Snark (December 18, 2015 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Last Week: I am not sure anyone really cares that the Hunger Games won last week’s box office.  I mean, a solid month in the top spot is an impressive feat, but Mockingjay Part Two will undoubtedly be overshadowed and their achievements long forgotten as the new JJ Abrams led Star Wars franchise lifts off this week.  In fact, I think advance tickets sales we almost half of the latest Hunger Games’ $244 domestic overall haul.  It’s hard to imagine The Force Awakens not surpassing $250M domestic before we ring in the New Year.  I confess that I am disappointed that Ron Howard’s latest movie, In the Heart of the Sea could only muster an $11M opening in second place this past week as a debut.  The rest of the list remains much the same as previous week’s, and overall box office sales were weak.  I guess all of that cash went to the Star Wars advanced sales.  So, let’s now waste any more time and move on to this week’s pictures…….as if you have not seen this first trailer…..

Star Wars Episode VII:  The Force Awakens (Disney) – Sci-Fi/Action
Rated PG-13 for sci-fi action violence
Tag Line:  Coming to your galaxy this winter.
Starring: Daisy Ridley, John Boyega, Harrison Ford, Carrie Fischer, Mark Hamill
Plot: Three decades after the defeat of the Galactic Empire, a new threat arises. The First Order attempts to rule the galaxy and only a rag-tag group of heroes can stop them, along with the help of the Resistance.
Running Time: 135 minutes

Chris: I mean, really.  Is anyone not seeing this film?  JJ Abrams rescues another sci-fi franchise.  Pure gold.
Jessica: All my eyes can see is STAR FREAKIN WARS!!!!!!! Cannot wait to check this out.
Rob: Peace is a lie, there is only passion. Through passion, I gain strength. Through strength, I gain power. Through power, I gain victory. Through victory, my chains are broken. The Force shall free me.FINALLY!  IT’S HERE!!!!  I will watch no other trailer.  I will see this film multiple times.  I can’t FREAKING wait!!!
Jim: Gee, never heard of it. Their Marketing department must be asleep.
Ken: ???

Alvin & the Chipmunks:  The Road Chip (Fox 2000) – Family
Rated PG for some mild rude humor
Tag Line:  Fast and Furry-ous
Starring:  Jason Lee, Kaley Cuoco, Bella Thorn, Anna Faris, Justin Long, and Christina Applegate
Plot: Through a series of misunderstandings, Alvin, Simon and Theodore come to believe that Dave is going to propose to his new girlfriend in Miami…and dump them. They have three days to get to him and stop the proposal, saving themselves not only from losing Dave but possibly from gaining a terrible stepbrother.
Running Time: 116 minutes

Jessica: Chipmunks must die.
Jim: I watch the trailer while shaking my head and thinking “Pure Evil.” I am truly happy that my daughter has never shown the slightest interest in seeing one of these movies.
Ken: Suuuuper cuuute. And formulaic.
Chris: Never liked them (even as a kid).  I haven’t seen the other two live action movies, and this one won’t break that streak.

Sisters (Universal) – Comedy
Rated R for crude sexual content and language throughout, and for drug use
Tag Line: Big sisters don’t always know best.
Starring:  Tina Fey, Amy Poehler
Plot: Two sisters decide to throw one last house party before their parents sell their family home.
Running Time: 118 minutes

Jim: I like Amy and Tina, but this just looks desperate.
Ken: I love Poehler and Fey.  One of the great comedy duos of all time, right up there with Spade and Farley.  Trailer was kinda meh, story seems derivative, but I’ll give it a watch sometime.
Chris: Tina Fey and Amy Poehler are not my favorite comedic actors, but the trailer did have me laughing at some very awkward scenes.  I’ll definitely catch it on the small screen.
Jessica: I’m sure it’s funny, those ladies are hilarious but that’s an at home view for sure.

Extraction (Lionsgate) – Thriller
Rated R for violence, language throughout and brief sexual content/nudity
Tag Line: Vengeance runs in the family.
Starring: Bruce Willis, Kellan Lutz, Gina Carano
Plot: A former CIA operative is kidnapped by a group of terrorists. When his son learns there is no plan for his father to be saved, he launches his own rescue operation.
Running Time: 113 minutes

Jessica: I do like a mindless action flick but I don’t know about this one…probably will catch it years from now for free on TV.
Ken: It’s good to see that Bruce Willis is still getting movie roles playing Bruce Willis.
Jim: I like Bruce Willis, but I’ve seen this movie too many times before. Might be worth a rental for Gina Carano (I liked Haywire).
Chris: I thought Bruce Willis said two or three years ago he was done making mindless action films.  His star is fading for sure, so he is probably happy he didn’t go direct to DVD/Streaming with this release.

Tickets Purchased:  Five tickets for….do I even have to say it?

Will Han Solo live to tell the tale?  Millions of Facebookers forbid you to disclose this information!
Will Han Solo live to tell the tale? Millions of Facebookers forbid you to disclose this information!