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Trailer Snark (March 17, 2017 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Beauty and the Beast (Disney) – Family/Fantasy/Musical
Rated PG for some action violence, peril and frightening images
Tag Line:  Experience the tale as old as time.
Starring:  Emma Watson, Dan Stevens, Luke Evans
Plot: An adaptation of the Disney fairy tale about a monstrous-looking prince and a young woman who fall in love.
Running Time: 129 minutes

Chris: I have been impressed with Disney’s live action presentations of their classic animated works.  And from the looks of things, I won’t be changing my opinion any time soon.
Jessica: I’d rather watch the cartoon. I’ve read many versions of the story and I do really adore it, but this does nothing for me for some reason, which is surprising because I love musicals and Hermoine!

T2 Trainspotting (Sony) – Drama
Rated R for drug use, language throughout, strong sexual content, graphic nudity and some violence
Tag Line: Face your past.  Choose your future.
Starring: Ewan MacGregor, Jonny Lee Miller, Ewen Bremner
Plot: After 20 years abroad, Mark Renton returns to Scotland and reunites with his old friends Sick Boy, Spud, and Begbie.
Running Time: 117 minutes

Jessica: I saw the original and remember liking it years ago, I’d have to rewatch it before I see this one, which looks like a good time to me. I can give or take Danny Boyles movies, but I remember enjoying the original film and you can really never go wrong with Ewan!
Chris: I was not a fan of the original, though I know it holds cult status among certain circles.  My appreciation for Ewan MacGregor’s talents came later than some.  Not my fix.

Song to Song (Broad Green Pictures) – Drama/Musical/Romance
Rated R for some sexuality, nudity, drug use and language
Tag Line: None
Starring: Ryan Gosling, Rooney Mara
Plot: Two intersecting love triangles. Obsession and betrayal set against the music scene in Austin, Texas.
Running Time: 129 minutes

Chris: What is with Ryan Gosling and musicals?  Love that Dion tune!  The trailer, not so much.
Jessica: Eh, looks like typical Ryan Gosling fair, entertaining but not theater worthy.

The Belko Experiment (High Top Releasing) – Horror/Thriller/Action
Rated R for strong bloody violence throughout, language including sexual references, and some drug use
Tag Line: Office Space Meets Battle Royale
Starring: John Gallagher Jr, Tony Goldwyn
Plot: In a twisted social experiment, 80 Americans are locked in their high-rise corporate office in Bogotá, Colombia and ordered by an unknown voice coming from the company’s intercom system to participate in a deadly game of kill or be killed.
Running Time: 88 minutes
Jessica: OH MY GOD does this look amazing. Office workers trying to kill each other? Michael Rooker! John C McGinley! Tony Goldwyn! I AM IN.
Chris: My wife will wonder who she married when I take her to the movies, buy her a ticket for Beauty and the Beast and some popcorn, and tell her I will meet her in the lobby after the showing for this movie. 😉

Tickets Purchased:  Two for The Belko Experiment

Yeah, it's kind of like that.
Yeah, it’s kind of like that.


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Trailer Snark (October 21, 2016 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Jack Reacher: Never Go Back (Paramount) – Action/Adventure
Rated PG-13 for sequences of violence and action, some bloody images, language and thematic elements
Tag Line: Never give in, Never give up, Never go back
Starring: Tom Cruise, Cobie Smulders
Plot: Jack Reacher must uncover the truth behind a major government conspiracy in order to clear his name. On the run as a fugitive from the law, Reacher uncovers a potential secret from his past that could change his life forever.
Running Time: 118 minutes

Jessica: I saw the first one they did and really enjoyed it. I’ve also read a bunch of the Jack Reacher books, including this one, and love the stories. I think even though Cruise looks NOTHING like how Jack Reacher is described in the books, he did a fantastic job and I’m excited for this one.
Chris:  Feeling some Rick Astley love in that tag line.  This movie never gonna give you up.  Never gonna let you down.  Never gonna run around and hurt you.  Yeah!

Ouija: Origin of Evil (Universal) – Horror/Thriller
Rated PG-13 for disturbing images, terror and thematic elements
Tag Line: No telling what you’ll see.
Starring: Elizabeth Reaser, Lulu Wilson
Plot: In 1965 Los Angeles, a widowed mother and her two daughters add a new stunt to bolster their seance scam business and unwittingly invite authentic evil into their home. When the youngest daughter is overtaken by a merciless spirit, the family confronts unthinkable fears to save her and send her possessor back to the other side.
Running Time: 99 minutes

Chris: While I like the throwback sixties vibe, this looks like your standard run of the mill horror outing.  Better saved for a Netflix stream.
Jessica: Pass. When the trailer makes it seem cheesy and lame, that usually means the movie is going to be cheesy and lame. Plus, haven’t there been like twelve BILLION Ouija board movies already? Enough already! Next thing you know there will be a zombie vampire movie about using Ouija boards that turn into magical turnips or something.

Keeping Up with the Joneses (Fox) – Comedy
Rated PG-13 for sexual content, action/violence and brief strong language
Tag Line: Meet the Joneses.
Starring: Zach Galafianakis, Isla Fisher, Gal Gadot
Plot: A suburban couple becomes embroiled in an international espionage plot when they discover that their seemingly perfect new neighbors are government spies.
Running Time: 105 minutes

Jessica: When I saw Gal Gadot and Hamm and Zack and Isla I was partially sold. When he yelled into his tie microphone I laughed out loud. This looks like a fun, stupidly funny action comedy. love it.
Chris: I am with Jess on this one.  Laughter is good medicine in times such as these.  Bring on the silliness!

Boo! A Madea Halloween (Lionsgate) – Comedy/Horror
Rated PG-13 for drug use and references, suggestive content, language, some horror images and thematic material
Tag Line: Witch, please.
Starring: Tyler Perry, Cassi Davis
Plot: Madea winds up in the middle of mayhem when she spends a haunted Halloween fending off killers, paranormal poltergeists, ghosts, ghouls and zombies while keeping a watchful eye on a group of misbehaving teens.
Running Time: 103 minutes

Chris: While I was mildly amused by the trailer, I am not sure if this will be the film to break my streak of not watching Tyler Perry movies.
Jessica: You can’t PAY me to even WATCH this BS trailer. P A S S.

American Pastoral (Lionsgate) – Crime/Drama
Rated R for some strong sexual material, language and brief violent images
Tag Line: A radically ordinary story.
Starring: Ewan MacGregor, Jennifer Connelly
Plot: In 1968, a hardworking man, who’s been a staple in his quaint community for years, watches his seemingly perfect middle class life fall apart as his daughter’s new radical political affiliation threatens to destroy their family.
Running Time: 126 minutes

Jessica: I have no idea what this is about but I am intrigued.
Chris:  Probably the shortest Trailer Snark trailer we have had.  That said, directorial debut of Ewan MacGregor.  It will be worth seeing if he is every bit the director as he is the actor.  Count me in!

31 (Saban Films) – Horror/Thriller
Rated R for strong bloody horror violence, pervasive language, sexual content and drug use
Tag Line: Welcome to Hell
Starring: Malcolm McDowell, Meg Foster, Richard Brake
Plot: Five carnival workers are kidnapped and held hostage in an abandoned, Hell-like compound where they are forced to participate in a violent game, the goal of which is to survive twelve hours against a gang of sadistic clowns.
Running Time: 102 minutes

Chris:  I was not a fan of Zombie’s last film, Lords of Salem.  I wonder if he can rebound with this one?  The subject matter is certainly timely with America’s clown problem.
Jessica: I’ll watch anything Zombie makes so I’m in on this one!

I’m Not Ashamed (Pure-flix) – Biography/Drama
Rated PG-13 for thematic material, teen drinking and smoking, disturbing violent content and some suggestive situations
Tag Line: Her faith would touch the world.
Starring: Masey McLain, Ben Davies
Plot: Based on the inspiring and powerful true story and journal entries of Rachel Joy Scott- the first student killed in the Columbine high school shooting in 1999.
Running Time: 112 minutes

Jessica: I honestly don’t know that I am ready for any film dealing with school shootings, especially in the current climate we’re in, but I give them credit for focusing on one of the slain, rather than the killers.
Chris: Tears welled up with this trailer.  I will definitely be seeing this one.

Moonlight (A24) – Drama
Rated R for some sexuality, drug use, brief violence, and language throughout
Tag Line:  This is the story of a lifetime.
Starring: Mahershala Ali, Shariff Earp
Plot: A timeless story of human connection and self-discovery, Moonlight chronicles the life of a young black man from childhood to adulthood as he struggles to find his place in the world while growing up in a rough neighborhood of Miami.
Running Time: 110 minutes
Chris:  Personal journey movie fraught with tragedy.  Will be a good small screen viewer, I think.
Jessica: Another one where the trailer tells us very little, but the little it tells me is that it’s dealing with a man trying to find himself in a culture that does not fully accept who he is. Looks powerful.

Tickets Purchased: Two for Keeping Up with the Joneses

You'd never know that beneath the smiles lay a desperate pit of envy and distrust...but all for our utter amusement.
You’d never know that beneath the smiles lay a desperate pit of envy and distrust…but all for our utter amusement.
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Trailer Snark (July 1, 2016 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Last Week: Finding Dory was the box office champ for the second week in a row taking in an additional $73.2M for a total domestic haul of $286.5M.  Independence Day:Resurgence had a disappointing second place bow with only $41.6M, which was substantially less than the original’s debut.  Central Intelligence fell one spot to third place with $18.3M and $69.3M overall.  Two other debuts occupied the fourth and fifth slots as The Shallows scared up $16.7M and Free State of Jones took in $7.7M.  The rest of the top ten went as follows: The Conjuring 2 ($7.7M/$86.9M), Now You See Me 2 ($5.6M/$52M), X-Men: Apocalypse ($2.4M/$151.1M), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows ($2.4M/$77.1M), and Alice Through the Looking Glass ($2.1M/$74.5M).

Fun Fact:  Seven of the ten movies in the aforementioned list are sequels.  And another sequel is on its way this week, along with a reboot of a pre-existing franchise.

The Purge: Election Year (Universal) – Horror/Thriller
Rated R for disturbing bloody violence and strong language
Tag Line: Purge for the people.
Starring:  Frank Grillo, Elizabeth Mitchell
Plot: Two years after choosing not to kill the man who killed his son, former police sergeant Barnes has become head of security for Senator Charlene Roan, the front runner in the next Presidential election due to her vow to eliminate the Purge.
Running Time: 105 minutes

Chris: This franchise started with a scary concept, and now we are beating the dead horse.  Frank Grillo still rocks though.
Jim: The first time was enough, don’t need to witness Hollywood beating yet another idea into the ground.

The BFG (Disney) -Adventure/Family
Rated PG for action/peril, some scary moments and brief rude humor
Tag Line: The world is more giant than you can imagine.
Starring: Mark Rylance, Bill Hader, Ruby Barnhill
Plot: A girl named Sophie encounters the Big Friendly Giant who, despite his intimidating appearance, turns out to be a kindhearted soul who is considered an outcast by the other giants because, unlike them, he refuses to eat children.
Running Time: 117 minutes

Jim: Spielberg directing a Roald Dahl story—all I need to know, I’m there.
Chris: I am sure that it is up to the usual Disney quality, but I am just not that interested.  Give me Jack and the Giant Killer any day.

The Legend of Tarzan (Warner Bros) – Adventure/Action
Rated PG-13 for sequences of action and violence, some sensuality and brief rude dialogue
Tag Line: Human. Nature.
Starring: Alexander Skarsgard, Rory J. Saper, Samuel Jackson, Margot Robbie
Plot: Tarzan, having acclimated to life in London, is called back to his former home in the jungle to investigate the activities at a mining encampment.
Running Time: 109 minutes

Chris: Yes, now this looks like a great summer epic movie.  Classic character and fresh new take.
Jim: This story is ageless, even surviving an overblown ’80s version with Christopher Lambert. Would be interesting to see it in the CGI era. Keeping my fingers crossed while walking on my knuckles.

Our Kind of Traitor (Roadside Attractions) – Thriller
Rated R for violence, language throughout, some sexuality, nudity and brief drug use
Tag Line:  Who can you trust with the truth?
Starring: Ewan MacGregor, Stellan Skarsgard
Plot: A couple find themselves lured into a Russian oligarch’s plans to defect are soon positioned between the Russian Mafia and the British Secret Service, neither of whom they can trust.
Running Time: 107 minutes

Jim: Eh, possible rental.
Chris: Could be one of those under-stated gems.  I’ll catch it on the small screen, even if just for the acting prowess of Ewan MacGregor alone.

Satanic (Magnet Releasing) – Horror
Rated R for bloody horror violence, language throughout, brief nudity and some drug use
Tag Line: They unleashed the ultimate evil.
Starring: Sarah Hyland, Steven Krueger
Plot: Four friends on their way to Coachella stop off in Los Angeles to tour true-crime occult sites, only to encounter a mysterious young runaway who puts them on a terrifying path to ultimate horror.
Running Time: 85 minutes

Chris: I love me a good cult horror film, but the trailer just didn’t do it for me.  Maybe I will go back and watch Spellbinder for old times sake.
Jim: Any exorcists available to purge the glut of bad horror trailers?

Tickets Purchased:  One for The BFG (Jim) and one for The Legend of Tarzan (Chris)

Will Disney giants or jungle legends get you to the theaters this weekend?
Will Disney giants or jungle legends get you to the theaters this weekend?
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Trailer Snark (May 13th, 2016 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Last Week: Captain America:  Civil War ruled all with a whopping $181.7M in receipts.  Jungle Book was a very distant second at $21.8 bringing its total to $284.9M domestic.  Third place Mother’s Day did not crack double digits at $9M and $20.7M overall.  Botttom line is a Disney Box Office wipeout.  The rest of the top ten shook out like this:  Huntsman:  Winter’s War ($3.5M/$40.3M), Keanu ($3M/$15.1M), Barbershop ($2.7M/$48.7M), Zootopia ($2.6M/$327.6M), The Boss ($$1.7M/$59.1M), and Batman vs Superman ($1M/$327.2M).  Now, on to this week’s new releases, sure to be crushed by Civil War.

Money Monster (Sony) – Drama
Rated R for language throughout, some sexuality and brief violence
Tag Line: #FollowTheMoney
Starring: George Clooney, Julia Roberts
Plot: Financial TV host Lee Gates and his producer Patty are put in an extreme situation when an irate investor takes over their studio.
Running Time: 98 minutes

Jessica: Snooze fest.
Jim: Love these Dog Day Afternoon set-ups. A strong cast helps.
Chris:  Some days I’d like to punch George Clooney in his perfect teeth.

The Darkness (High Top) – Horror/Thriller
Rated PG-13 for thematic elements, some disturbing violence, brief sensuality and language
Tag Line: Evil comes home.
Starring:  Kevin Bacon, Jennifer Morrison
Plot:  A family returns from a Grand Canyon vacation, haunted by an ancient supernatural entity they unknowingly awakened and engages them in a fight for their survival.
Running Time: 92 minutes

Chris:  Kevin Bacon and Jennifer Morrison last starred together in Stir of Echoes….good flick.  Not sure if I feel the stir with this trailer, however.
Jessica: Great choice to put it out on Friday the 13th and I love Kevin Bacon. The kid makes me nuts on “Gotham” but this could be a good home viewer.
Jim: Despite the presence of the great Kevin Bacon, looks like a by-the numbers modern horror movie.

Love and Friendship (Roadside Attractions) – Drama/Romance
Rated PG for some thematic elements
Tag Line: A lady never reveals her tactics.
Starring: Kate Beckinsale, Chloe Sevigny
Plot: Lady Susan Vernon takes up temporary residence at her in-laws’ estate and, while there, is determined to be a matchmaker for her daughter Frederica — and herself too, naturally.
Running Time: 92 minutes

Jim: Costume pictures are always a risk. They can be great (Dangerous Liasons), but most of the time it always looks too much like what it is—modern-day actors playing dress-up.
Chris: My mom would love this…yes, that was a back-handed compliment. 😉
Jessica: I got bored during the trailer. Skip!

The Lobster (A24) – Comedy/Drama/Romance
Rated R for sexual content including dialogue, and some violence
Tag Line: An unconventional love story by Yorgos Lanthimos.
Starring:  Colin Farrell, Rachel Weisz
Plot: In a dystopian near future, single people, according to the laws of The City, are taken to The Hotel, where they are obliged to find a romantic partner in forty-five days or are transformed into beasts and sent off into The Woods.
Running Time: 118 minutes

Jessica: I love quirky films and this looks just on the right side of quirky.
Jim: Looks bizarre enough to be interesting.
Chris:  Man, Collin packed on some weight for this lobster roll!

High Rise (Magnolia Pictures) – Drama
Rated R for violence, disturbing images, strong sexual content/graphic nudity, language and some drug use
Tag Line: Leave the real world behind.
Starring:  Tom Hiddleston, Jeremy Irons, Sienna Miller
Plot: Life for the residents of a tower block begins to run out of control.
Running Time:  119 minutes

Chris:  Looks like Snowpiercer in an apartment building.  Meh.
Jessica: Another one that intrigues me and I do so love Loki! I would watch this at home.
Jim: It must be Brit Week here on Trailer Snark—another strange, interesting- looking movie.

Last Days in the Desert (Broad Green Pictures) – Adventure/History/Drama
Rated PG-13 for some disturbing images and brief partial nudity
Tag Line: None
Starring:  Ewan MacGregor, Ciaran Hinds
Plot: An imagined chapter from Jesus’ forty days of fasting and praying in the desert. On his way out of the wilderness, Jesus struggles with the Devil over the fate of a family in crisis.
Running Time: 98 minutes

Jim: Sorry, No.
Chris: I love Ewan MacGregor and this one looks interesting to me.  Small screen viewing for sure.
Jessica: Not my cup of tea.

Search Party (Focus World) – Comedy
Rated R for language throughout, drug use, graphic nudity, and sexual content
Tag Line: This is not a vacation.  It’s a rescue mission.
Starring:  Adam Pally, T.J. Miller, Alison Brie
Plot: A pair of friends embark on a mission to reunite their pal with the woman he was going to marry.
Running Time: 93 minutes

Jessica: A poor mans Hangover. No thanks.
Jim: Scraping the last dregs of The Hangover. The vomiting donkey doesn’t help.
Chris: From the “I didn’t need to see that” files comes donkey puke!  The trailer was enough for me.  Pass.

Tickets Purchased:  Two for a re-visit with Civil War (Jessica and Chris) and one for Money Monster (Jim)

Box Office Champ?  Civil War's second week will be very telling!
Box Office Champ? Civil War’s second week will be very telling!


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Trailer Snark (April 1, 2016 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Last Week: Batman v. Superman was the undisputed box office champ this week with a monstrous $170M opening.  Zootopia slipped to #2 with an additional $23.1M for a total of $240.5M domestic.  My Big Fat Greek Wedding #2 debuted at number three with $18.1M.  Miracles from Heaven slipped to number four with $9.5M to add to its $34M take.  Allegiant rounded out the top five ($$9.5M/$46.6M).  The rest of the top ten went as follows:  10 Cloverfield Ln ($6/$56M), Deadpool ($5M/$349.4M), London Has Fallen ($2.9M/$55.6M), Hello My Name is Doris ($1.5M/$3.1M), and Eye in the Sky ($1M/$1.7M).  And that brings us to this week’s offerings…..

Everybody Wants Some (Paramount) – Comedy
Rated R for language throughout, sexual content, drug use and some nudity
Tag Line: From Writer/Director Richard Linklater Comes The Spiritual Sequel To Dazed and Confused
Starring:  Blake Jenner, Ryan Guzman
Plot: A group of college baseball players navigate their way through the freedoms and responsibilities of unsupervised adulthood.
Running Time: 116 minutes

Jim: LOVE Dazed and Confused and Linklater movies in general. I’ll be there.
Jessica: I LOVE “Dazed & Confused” and I also enjoyed the 80s, so this is right up my alley. Looks silly and fun and also quite stupid, which I also dig.
Chris: A movie to shut off your brain to is always welcome, especially when Linklater is at the helm.

God’s Not Dead 2 (Pure Flix) – Drama
Rated PG for some thematic elements
Tag Line: None
Starring: Melissa Joan Hart, Jesse Metcalfe
Plot: When a high school teacher is asked a question in class about Jesus, her reasoned response lands her in deep trouble and could expel God from the public square once and for all.
Running Time: 121 minutes

Chris:  The first movie was surprisingly good.  I’ll catch this one on Netflix.
Jim: Looks interesting, but not enough to get me to see it.
Jessica: There was a 1st one of this? Gimme a break. I stopped the trailer halfway through. I am not the audience for this.

Miles Ahead (Sony Picture Classics) – Biography/Drama/Music
Rated R for strong language throughout, drug use, some sexuality/nudity and brief violence
Tag Line: If you gotta tell a story, come with some attitude
Starring: Don Cheadle, Ewan MacGregor
Plot: An exploration of the life and music of Miles Davis.
Running Time: 100 minutes

Jessica: Don Cheadle as Miles? Seems like a fantastic combo to me. Looks interesting, not something I’d go to the theater for, but I’d watch this at home.
Chris: Apparently there was a run on music artist biographies this past month.  But this may be the diamond among them from the looks of things.
Jim: Certainly a major figure for his field, but looks like a by-the-numbers musician bio.

Meet the Blacks (Freestyle Releasing) – Comedy
Rated R for pervasive language, some sexual material, violence and drug use
Tag Line: Just when you thought it was safe to move to Beverly Hills…
Starring: Mike Epps, Zulay Henao
Plot:  As Carl Black gets the opportunity to move his family out of Chicago in hope of a better life, their arrival in Beverly Hills is timed with that city’s annual purge, where all crime is legal for twelve hours.
Running Time: 90 minutes

Jim: Can we please fast-forward to summer when movies will look good again?
Jessica: Could be super funny, could be awful. Watching at home will tell me…Eventually, maybe.
Chris:  Spoof movie trash.
Kill Your Friends (Well Go USA) – Comedy/Crime/Thriller
Not Rated
Tag Line: Lies. Betrayal. Murder. Just another day at the office.
Starring: Nicholas Hoult, Ed Skrein
Plot: An A&R man working at the height of the Britpop music craze goes to extremes in order to find his next hit.
Running Time: 103 minutes

Chris:  Not a chance….
Jim: ok. MAYbe.
Jessica: Oh yes! I saw a trailer for this earlier, it looks like an updated “American Psycho” kind of flick. I really like Hoult so I would see this, I love a good, dark comedy.

Natural Born Pranksters (Lionsgate) – Comedy
Rated R for crude and dangerous pranks, language throughout and sexual content
Tag Line: The pranks just got a whole lot bigger…we measured.
Starring: Vitaly Zdorovetskiy, Roman Atwood
Plot: YouTube’s best pranksters, Roman Atwood, Vitaly Z, and Dennis Roady make the leap to the big screen.
Running Time: 90 minutes

Jessica: I didn’t even finish the trailer, I could care less about internet pranksters doing a movie.
Chris: Youtube was free.  Pass.
Jim: I’m dyin’ here.

Tickets Purchased:  Three tickets for Everybody Wants Some!!

The art of hazing was perfected in the 80's.
The art of hazing was perfected in the 80’s.