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Trailer Snark (December 15, 2018 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Eric from View from Above, Robert from Cards and Counters, Wayne from The Dope Sheet, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi (Disney) – Action/Advernture/Sci-Fi
Rated PG-13 for sequences of sci-fi action and violence.
Tag Line: None
Starring: Daisy Ridley, John Boyega, Oscar Isaac, Adam Driver
Plot: Rey develops her newly discovered abilities with the guidance of Luke Skywalker, who is unsettled by the strength of her powers. Meanwhile, the Resistance prepares to do battle with the First Order.
Running Time: 152 minutes

Rob F: It’s finally here!!! We’re going to get some answers about Luke, Rey, and Snoke! We’re going to build on the greatest entertainment franchise in the history of mankind. This is way better than Christmas! Fan event tickets for Thursday’s first showing are locked and loaded on IMAX. May the Force be with you…
Chris: The reinvigorated franchise is back with the middle frame of its latest trilogy, and throngs of Star Wars faithful will never be the same.  Every movie is an event in and of itself.  Let the debate begin on the result.

Ferdinand (20th Century Fox Animation) – Animation/Adventure/Comedy
Rated PG for rude humor, action and some thematic elements
Tag Line: This Christmas, BULL-ieve.
Starring: John Cena, Kate McKinnon, Bobby Canavale
Plot: After Ferdinand, a bull with a big heart, is mistaken for a dangerous beast, he is captured and torn from his home. Determined to return to his family, he rallies a misfit team on the ultimate adventure.
Running Time: 106 minutes

Chris: With this week’s purchase of Fox’s film rights, don’t we technically consider this one a Disney Film?  Is there a princess in it anywhere?  Is John Cena the princess?  Will John Cena now visit my house to bodyslam me through my coffee table?  News at 11.
Rob F: Looks mediocre, but will probably end up watching it as a rental with my youngest down the road.  

Permanent (Magnolia) – Comedy
Rated PG-13 for crude sexual references, language and thematic elements
Tag Line: Hairstyles are temporary. Families are forever.
Starring: Patricia Arquette, Rainn Wilson, Kira McLean
Plot: Permanent is a comedy about bad hair, adolescence, and socially awkward family members. It involves life-altering permanents and poorly-made toupees. Obstacles to daily survival ensue.
Running Time: 93 minutes

Rob F: Hard pass. If this were a magazine I would not be a subscriber.
Chris: I wouldn’t buy a ticket with Rob’s wallet.

Beyond Skyline (Vertical Entertainment) – Action/Adventure/Horror
Rated R for sequences of bloody sci-fi violence, and language throughout.
Tag Line: None
Starring: Frank Grillo, Bojana Novakovic, Iko Uwais
Plot: A tough-as-nails detective embarks on a relentless pursuit to free his son from a nightmarish alien warship.
Running Time: 105 minutes

Chris:  I hadn’t even heard of this one before seeing the news of its release this week.  But it looks to me like a fun little theater outing.  Frank Grillo is bad*ss.
Rob F: I would probably enjoy renting this. It’s got no chance at the box office though.

Tickets Purchased:  Two for Star Wars….like it was a contest.

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Trailer Snark (July 1, 2016 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Last Week: Finding Dory was the box office champ for the second week in a row taking in an additional $73.2M for a total domestic haul of $286.5M.  Independence Day:Resurgence had a disappointing second place bow with only $41.6M, which was substantially less than the original’s debut.  Central Intelligence fell one spot to third place with $18.3M and $69.3M overall.  Two other debuts occupied the fourth and fifth slots as The Shallows scared up $16.7M and Free State of Jones took in $7.7M.  The rest of the top ten went as follows: The Conjuring 2 ($7.7M/$86.9M), Now You See Me 2 ($5.6M/$52M), X-Men: Apocalypse ($2.4M/$151.1M), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows ($2.4M/$77.1M), and Alice Through the Looking Glass ($2.1M/$74.5M).

Fun Fact:  Seven of the ten movies in the aforementioned list are sequels.  And another sequel is on its way this week, along with a reboot of a pre-existing franchise.

The Purge: Election Year (Universal) – Horror/Thriller
Rated R for disturbing bloody violence and strong language
Tag Line: Purge for the people.
Starring:  Frank Grillo, Elizabeth Mitchell
Plot: Two years after choosing not to kill the man who killed his son, former police sergeant Barnes has become head of security for Senator Charlene Roan, the front runner in the next Presidential election due to her vow to eliminate the Purge.
Running Time: 105 minutes

Chris: This franchise started with a scary concept, and now we are beating the dead horse.  Frank Grillo still rocks though.
Jim: The first time was enough, don’t need to witness Hollywood beating yet another idea into the ground.

The BFG (Disney) -Adventure/Family
Rated PG for action/peril, some scary moments and brief rude humor
Tag Line: The world is more giant than you can imagine.
Starring: Mark Rylance, Bill Hader, Ruby Barnhill
Plot: A girl named Sophie encounters the Big Friendly Giant who, despite his intimidating appearance, turns out to be a kindhearted soul who is considered an outcast by the other giants because, unlike them, he refuses to eat children.
Running Time: 117 minutes

Jim: Spielberg directing a Roald Dahl story—all I need to know, I’m there.
Chris: I am sure that it is up to the usual Disney quality, but I am just not that interested.  Give me Jack and the Giant Killer any day.

The Legend of Tarzan (Warner Bros) – Adventure/Action
Rated PG-13 for sequences of action and violence, some sensuality and brief rude dialogue
Tag Line: Human. Nature.
Starring: Alexander Skarsgard, Rory J. Saper, Samuel Jackson, Margot Robbie
Plot: Tarzan, having acclimated to life in London, is called back to his former home in the jungle to investigate the activities at a mining encampment.
Running Time: 109 minutes

Chris: Yes, now this looks like a great summer epic movie.  Classic character and fresh new take.
Jim: This story is ageless, even surviving an overblown ’80s version with Christopher Lambert. Would be interesting to see it in the CGI era. Keeping my fingers crossed while walking on my knuckles.

Our Kind of Traitor (Roadside Attractions) – Thriller
Rated R for violence, language throughout, some sexuality, nudity and brief drug use
Tag Line:  Who can you trust with the truth?
Starring: Ewan MacGregor, Stellan Skarsgard
Plot: A couple find themselves lured into a Russian oligarch’s plans to defect are soon positioned between the Russian Mafia and the British Secret Service, neither of whom they can trust.
Running Time: 107 minutes

Jim: Eh, possible rental.
Chris: Could be one of those under-stated gems.  I’ll catch it on the small screen, even if just for the acting prowess of Ewan MacGregor alone.

Satanic (Magnet Releasing) – Horror
Rated R for bloody horror violence, language throughout, brief nudity and some drug use
Tag Line: They unleashed the ultimate evil.
Starring: Sarah Hyland, Steven Krueger
Plot: Four friends on their way to Coachella stop off in Los Angeles to tour true-crime occult sites, only to encounter a mysterious young runaway who puts them on a terrifying path to ultimate horror.
Running Time: 85 minutes

Chris: I love me a good cult horror film, but the trailer just didn’t do it for me.  Maybe I will go back and watch Spellbinder for old times sake.
Jim: Any exorcists available to purge the glut of bad horror trailers?

Tickets Purchased:  One for The BFG (Jim) and one for The Legend of Tarzan (Chris)

Will Disney giants or jungle legends get you to the theaters this weekend?
Will Disney giants or jungle legends get you to the theaters this weekend?