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Trailer Snark (October 20, 2017 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Eric from View from Above, Robert from Cards and Counters, Wayne from The Dope Sheet, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Wonderstruck (Amazon Studios) – Drama/Family/Mystery
Rated PG for thematic elements and smoking
Tag Line: It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.
Starring: Oakes Fegley, Julianne Moore, Michelle Williams
Plot: The story of a young boy in the Midwest is told simultaneously with a tale about a young girl in New York from fifty years ago as they both seek the same mysterious connection.
Running Time: 117 minutes

Wayne: Hmmm. Looks like a wonderful movie, but there is something that is missing in the trailer to grab me and I bet it is missing something in the movie too.
Chris: I see the “praise” but I don’t see the appeal.
Jim: Definitely a feel-good trailer, but I think mainly because I can never get enough of Space Oddity. The trailer has that something missing that would get me to the theater.

The Snowman (Universal) – Crime/Drama/Horror
Rated R for grisly images, violence, some language, sexuality and brief nudity
Tag Line: Mister Police. You Could have Saved Her. I Gave You All The Clues.
Starring: Michael Fassbender, Rebecca Ferguson
Plot: Detective Harry Hole investigates the disappearance of a woman whose pink scarf is found wrapped around an ominous-looking snowman.
Running Time: 119 minutes

Jim: A slow buildup, but it had me intrigued. Rental.
Wayne: It doesn’t appeal to me, but given the time of year we are in, the Halloween scary movie feel is in the air and I have a feeling it will be a success this weekend. But not for me.
Chris: This one looks like creepy good crime thriller fun. I missed Wind River earlier this year which seemed to have some similar themes, but I will need to do my best to catch this one.

Same Kind of Different As Me (Paramount) – Drama
Rated PG-13 for thematic elements including some violence and language
Tag Line: None
Starring: Renée Zellweger, Jon Voight, Djimon Hounsou
Plot: International art dealer Ron Hall must befriend a dangerous homeless man in order to save his struggling marriage to his wife, a woman whose dreams will lead all three of them on the journey of their lives.
Running Time: 95 minutes

Chris: A movie with a message I can get behind and will make you feel good….just put the lessons into practice first. Count me in.
Jim: Certainly had a message that we could all benefit from, but to be honest the trailer piled on the schmaltz a bit too much.
Wayne: All Star cast but doesn’t give you the good feels. No good feels means no ticket. I pass.

Geostorm (Warner Bros) – Action/Sci-Fi/Thriller
Rated PG-13 for destruction, action and violence
Tag Line: Some things were never meant to be controlled.
Starring: Gerard Butler, Jim Sturgess, Abbie Cornish
Plot: When the network of satellites designed to control the global climate start to attack Earth, it’s a race against the clock to uncover the real threat before a worldwide geostorm wipes out everything and everyone.
Running Time: 109 minutes

Wayne: I don’t care for these types of films because they usually rely heavily on the cgi effects. I’m going to pass on this.
Chris: This is the kind of garbage that gives Hollywood a bad name….I mean, outside of Harvey Weinstein.
Jim: The latest cheesy disaster flick, but it might have some worth as a guilty pleasure. I’m hoping. ‘Cause my daughter wants to see it. Keep me in your prayers.

Tyler Perry’s Boo 2: A Madea Halloween (Lionsgate) – Comedy/Horror
PG-13 for sexual references, drug content, language and some horror images
Tag Line: None
Starring: Tyler Perry, Patrice Lovely, Brock O’Hurn
Plot: Madea, Bam, and Hattie venture to a haunted campground and the group must run for their lives when monsters, goblins, and the boogeyman are unleashed.
Running Time: 95 minutes

Jim: Jim Cannizzaro’s Noo 2. Sorry.
Wayne: I didn’t see the first and the second doesn’t make me feel any better. Pass.
Chris: I haven’t seen a Tyler Perry movie yet, and this ain’t changing that.

Only the Brave (Columbia) – Biography/Drama
Rated PG-13 for thematic content, some sexual references, language and drug material
Tag Line: It’s Not What Stands In Front Of You, It’s Who Stands Beside You
Starring: Josh Brolin, Miles Teller, Jeff Bridges
Plot: Based on the true story of the Granite Mountain Hotshots, a group of elite firefighters risk everything to protect a town from a historic wildfire.
Running Time: 133 minutes

Chris: Oscar buzz is in the air on this one. And it could not be more tragically timing.
Jim: Well, this looks like something resembling a movie. A quick shot and voice-over from Jeff Bridges gives me added hope, although he most likely isn’t in it for long. Interested.
Wayne: Another movie that doesn’t hit me in the feels and I won’t see. Feels like a throw away movie to me.

The Killing of a Sacred Deer (A24) – Drama/Horror/Mystery
R for disturbing violent and sexual content, some graphic nudity and language
Tag Line: None
Starring: Nicole Kidman, Colin Farrell, Alicia Silverstone
Plot: Steven, a charismatic surgeon, is forced to make an unthinkable sacrifice after his life starts to fall apart, when the behavior of a teenage boy he has taken under his wing turns sinister.
Running Time: 121 minutes

Wayne: Oh boy. Will she stop singing? Lousy trailer means I’m skipping this movie.
Chris: I was in a trance for the whole trailer, but I have no idea what this is really going to end up being about. I am very intrigued.
Jim: Intriguing trailer, but yet another that’s unclear as to what it’s about almost to the point of madness. Loved The Lobster.

Tickets Purchased: Two for The Snowman (Wayne and Chris) and One for Only the Brave (Jim)

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Trailer Snark (March 4 2016 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Last Week:  There was no stopping the merc with a mouth, as Deadpool spent a third week atop the box office charts, shaking off a pathetic challenge from the second place Gods of Egypt.  Fox scored another $31.5M for their R-rated superhero entry to bring the total domestic haul to $285.6M.  The aforementioned Gods of Egypt took in $14M in its debut.  In third was Kung Fu Panda 3 ($9M/$128.4M).  Fourth place belonged to the Christian drama Risen ($7M/$22.7M) and fifth was the debut of Eddie the Eagle with $6.3M.  Triple 9 could not break the top five and ended up with a $6.1M debut in sixth.  The rest of the top ten went as follows:  How to Be Single ($5.1M/$39.6M), The Witch ($5M/$16.6M), Race ($4.2M/$13.8M), and The Revanant ($3.8M/$170.5M).  So, who are this week’s contenders to Deadpool’s bullet-riddled crown?

Zootopia (Disney) – Family/Animated
Rated PG for some thematic elements, rude humor and action
Tag Line: Welcome to the urban jungle.
Starring: Ginnefer Goodwin, Jason Bateman, Idris Elba
Plot: In a city of anthropomorphic animals, a fugitive con artist fox and a rookie bunny cop must work together to uncover a conspiracy.
Running Time: 108 minutes

Chris: I must admit to being amused with the trailer.  Perhaps it is the mood of the political season, but I feel the need for something light-hearted and innocent.
Ken: I saw an extended trailer for this before Star Wars and I thought it was hysterical. Not a theater experience for me, but I’ll definitely catch this one at home.
Jim: Been laughing at this trailer for months, particularly the Sloth version. A must-see.
Jessica: The sloth cracks me up. I’d watch this on the strength of that alone.
Rob:  I’m all over this!!

London Has Fallen (Gramercy) – Action/Drama
Rated R for strong violence and language throughout
Tag Line: Prepare for bloody hell.
Starring: Gerard Butler, Aaron Eckhart, Morgan Freeman
Plot: In London for the Prime Minister’s funeral, Mike Banning discovers a plot to assassinate all the attending world leaders.
Running Time: 99 minutes

Rob: My interest has fallen.  Possible renter on a rainy day.
Chris: Make this the second straight week Gerard Butler has appeared in a movie I have no interest in.
Ken: I’d rather be waterboarded than suffer through this.
Jim: Olympus Has Fallen was pretty good as Die Hard knockoffs go. Not a lot of surprises here— might be good for a rental where I’m half awake on the couch.
Jessica: The first one was enjoyable, a fun action romp so I’d totally watch this at home, for free. What is up with Butler these days? First Gods of Egypt (gag) and now this? He used to be better than this garbage.

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot (Paramount) – Comedy/War
Rated R for pervasive language, some sexual content, drug use and violent war images
Tag Line: None
Starring:  Tina Fey, Margot Robbie, Martin Freeman, Alfred Molina
Plot: A journalist recounts her wartime coverage in Afghanistan and Pakistan.
Running Time: 112 minutes

Jessica: I love Tina Fey and this look like a good film. Not one for the theater but one I’d watch at home and probably very much enjoy.
Rob: What the f?  Come on.  You all wanted to say it.  But I’m betting only a small number want to see it.
Chris: Could be an entertaining flick on the small screen?  A non-Tina Fey role for Tina Fey.
Ken: Starring Tina Fey as herself in someone else’s true story.
Jim: More entertaining than the stupid trailer from  that Tina Fey movie  with Amy Poehler a couple of months ago. Rental.

The Other Side of the Door (20th Century Fox) – Horror
Rated R for some bloody violence
Tag Line: It was never meant to be opened.
Starring: Sarah Wayne Callies, Jeremy Sisto
Plot: After her young son is killed in a tragic accident, a woman learns of a ritual which will bring him back to say goodbye, but when she disobeys a sacred warning, she upsets the balance between life and death.
Running Time: 96 minutes

Jim: Not even one frame of film that contains something that I haven’t seen in other horror trailers/movies. I felt like it was yawning at me.
Jessica: Of COURSE she opened it. Looks fairly tried and true as far as horror films go. I’ll pass.
Rob: Horror.  Pass.
Chris: Nothing worse than seeing the main character be so monumentally dumb, you want to reach through the screen and shake them.  Pass.
Ken: Horror movies are generally cliche, but this just looks lazy. The lock that bars the doorway to the realm of the dead is a stick?? Come on!

Knight of Cups (Broad Green Pictures) – Drama/Romance
Rated R for some nudity, sexuality and language
Tag Line: None
Starring: Christian Bale, Cate Blanchett, Natalie Portman
Plot: A writer indulging in all that Los Angeles and Las Vegas has to offer undertakes a search for love and self via a series of adventures with six different women.
Running Time: 118 minutes

Ken: Looks like someone made a feature length film out of an ad for cologne.
Jim: As soon as I can figure out what’s going on in the trailer, I’ll tell you that it’s a Terrence Malick movie and worth seeing.
Jessica: I read about this one and have ZERO interest in watching a self-absorbed man wander through life looking for love. Even if that man used to be my secret husband Christian Bale. I got bored watching the trailer. All set.
Rob: No thanks.
Chris: Is this the most pretentious garbage you have seen this year at Trailer Snark?  I thought so.

Tickets Purchased:  It’s a unanimous decision folks!  Zootopia for President!!!!!!

Can we get Judy Hopps to run for President?
Can we get Judy Hopps to run for President?
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Trailer Snark (February 26 2016) Theatrical Trailers

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Last Week: Ryan Reynolds and Fox are celebrating their second straight week at number one as Deadpool captured another $55M at the Box Office and has now earned $235.3M domestic.  Kung Fu Panda 3 continued to get the kiddies to the cinema with $12.5M to add to its $117.1M total.  The highest debut of the week came from Risen with $11.8M.  Period horror piece, The Witch, debuted at number four with $8.6M.  How to Be Single fell to number five ($8.2M/$31.7M).  The only other debut in the top ten was Race at number six with $7.2M.  The rest of the list went as follows:  Zoolander 2 ($5.5M/$23.7M), Star Wars: The Force Awakens ($3.8M/$921.6M), The Revenant ($3.8M/$165.1M), and Hail, Caesar ($2.6M/$26.1M).  Its a short list of releases this week, but lets get down to it.

Gods of Egypt (Lionsgate) – Action/Adventure/Fantasy
Rated PG-13 for fantasy violence and action, and some sexuality
Tag Line: The journey of a lifetime begins.
Starring:  Gerard Butler, Brenton Thwaits
Plot: Mortal hero Bek teams with the god Horus in an alliance against Set, the merciless god of darkness who has usurped Egypt’s throne, plunging the once peaceful and prosperous empire into chaos and conflict.
Running Time: 127 minutes

Rob: High on visual effects and eye candy.  Worried about lack of story.  Renter.
Ken: Gods awful.
Jim: Yawn.
Chris:  I’d rather sit on the top of a pyramid.

Eddie the Eagle (20th Century Fox) – Biography/Sports/Drama
Rated PG-13 for some suggestive material, partial nudity and smoking
Tag Line: Landing in cinemas April 1
Starring: Taron Egerton, Hugh Jackman, Tom Costello, Jr.
Plot: The story of Eddie Edwards, the notoriously tenacious British underdog ski jumper who charmed the world at the 1988 Winter Olympics.
Running Time: 105 minutes

Chris:  A very charming trailer, and certainly a contender…pun very much intended.
Rob: The story of an unlikely Olympian.  I’d watch it for fun and more for my love of an underdog, but not on the big screen.
Ken: What sports fan doesn’t love a good underdog story? And it looks funny to boot.
Jim: Looks like a great, humorous story with the always entertaining Hugh Jackman.

Triple 9 (Open Road Films) – Crime/Thriller
Rated R for strong violence and language throughout, drug use and some nudity
Tag Line: The code on the street is never black and white.
Starring:  Casey Affleck, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Woody Harrelson
Plot: A gang of criminals and corrupt cops plan the murder of a police officer in order to pull off their biggest heist yet across town.
Running Time: 115 minutes

Jim: Yawn II
Chris: I love a good cop thriller movie.  And this one appears to be a promising one.
Rob: A decent looking cops & robbers thriller.  Decent doesn’t get me to the big screen though…
Ken: Love me a good heist movie. Pretty loaded cast too.

Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon: Sword of Destiny (The Weinstein Company)
Rated PG-13 for martial arts violence and brief partial nudity
Tag Line: The past returns with a vengeance.
Starring: Donnie Yen, Michelle Yeoh, Jason Scott Lee
Plot: A story of lost love, young love, a legendary sword and one last opportunity at redemption.
Running Time: 96 minutes
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h5ixd2ZRRpE
Rob: Limited IMAX release, but nothing near us.  Bummer!  But it’s a Netflix original so I can watch from the comfort of my own home.  Score!  Few films have been as visually stunning  as Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon.  Ang Lee delivered a masterpiece in 2001, but can Woo-ping Yuen do the same today?  Michelle Yeoh is reprising her role, so we can expect more amazing martial arts and solid acting on that front.  The trailer definitely has me excited to see if they can deliver once more.
Ken: Yup, what Rob said. I’m surprised that a sequel hadn’t been made before. Getting Netflix was the best decision I’ve ever made.
Jim: The first was one of Ang Lee’s amazing films. Based on the trailer, this looks like it keeps the bar high. Always worth watching Michelle Yeoh, count me in.
Chris:  Time to get all Martial Artsy!

Tickets Purchased:  3 for Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon (Jim, Ken, and Rob)…of course, you won’t be paying for any tickets watching it at home on your Netflix! Damn Kids!  1 for Triple 9 (Chris).

Oh, you said Martial....not Marital!
Oh, you said Martial….not Marital!