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Trailer Snark (November 18, 2016 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Warner Bros) – Adventure/Family
Rated PG-13 for some fantasy action violence
Tag Line: Explore a new era of J.K. Rowling’s wizarding world.
Starring: Eddie Redmayne, Katherine Waterston
Plot: The adventures of writer Newt Scamander in New York’s secret community of witches and wizards seventy years before Harry Potter reads his book in school.
Running Time: 133 minutes

Jessica: I’m a Harry Potter nerd so I do want to see this, even if it wasn’t technically a “real” HP book. Looks like a good amount of jolly HP fun!
Chris:  I can guarantee you I will be seeing this one since my wife is a massive Rowling fan.  My enthusiasm is measured, however.

The Edge of Seventeen (STX Entertainment) – Comedy/Drama
Rated R for sexual content, language and some drinking – all involving teens
Tag Line: You’re only young once… is it over yet?
Starring:  Hailee Steinfeld, Blake Jenner
Plot: High-school life gets even more unbearable for Nadine when her best friend, Krista, starts dating her older brother.
Running Time: 104 minutes

Chris: If I were a teen girl, I’d be all over this.
Jessica: Looks cute. I’d probably watch this at home. I do love a quirky coming of age film.

Bleed for This (Open Road) – Biography/Sports/Drama
Rated R for language, sexuality/nudity and some accident images
Tag Line: This is what the greatest comeback in sports history looks like
Starring: Miles Teller, Aaron Eckhart
Plot: The inspirational story of World Champion Boxer Vinny Pazienza who, after a near fatal car crash, which left him not knowing if he’d ever walk again, made one of sports most incredible comebacks.
Running Time: 116 minutes
Jessica:  I have NO love for Vinny Paz. I’ll pass.
Chris:  I’m with Jessica on this one. 

Manchester by the Sea (Roadside Attractions) – Drama
Rated R for language throughout and some sexual content
Tag Line:  None
Starring:  Casey Affleck, Michelle Williams
Plot: An uncle is forced to take care of his teenage nephew after the boy’s father dies.
Running Time: 137 minutes
Chris: No way is this a theater viewer, but it may make for a good home view.  Melodramas are better left for the small screen.
Jessica: Oh boy, another Affleck doing ANOTHER MA accent. I’m sure this is a touching, heartfelt, blah, blah, blah, but I’m kind of over it.

Nocturnal Animals (Focus Features) – Drama/Thriller
Rated R for violence, menace, graphic nudity, and language
Tag Line: When you love someone you can’t just throw it away
Starring:  Amy Adams, Jake Gyllenhaal, Michael Shannon
Plot: An art gallery owner is haunted by her ex-husband’s novel, a violent thriller she interprets as a veiled threat and a symbolic revenge tale.
Running Time: 117 minutes

Jessica: Blah. A lot of tense whispering.
Chris: That one got my attention!  Great cast, and looks to be a taut thriller.

The Eyes of My Mother (Magnet) – Drama/Horror
Rated R for disturbing violent content and behavior, and brief nudity
Tag Line: None
Starring: Kika Magalhaes, Olivia Bond, Will Brill
Plot: A young, lonely woman is consumed by her deepest and darkest desires after tragedy strikes her quiet country life.
Running Time: 76 minutes

Chris:  At 76 minutes, there must not be much story to tell. What’s worse is that they didn’t have the confidence to schedule this one against other Halloween fare.
Jessica: Where are the comedies? This trailer annoyed the crap out of me.

Officer Downe (Magnolia) – Action
Rated R for brutal bloody stylized violence throughout, a strong prolonged sex scene with nudity, and pervasive language
Tag Line: Protecting. Serving. Ass Kicking.
Starring: Tyler Ross, Kim Coates
Plot: Based on the graphic novel, a police officer who can’t be stopped by death returns to the streets time and time again to fight crime.
Running Time: 88 minutes

Jessica: Oh here’s a comedy! Ummm…This looks just insane enough that I’d want to see it.
Chris: Looks a bit campy and silly, but might be some fun.

A Streetcat Named Bob (Cleopatra) – Biography/Comedy/Drama
Not Rated
Tag Line: Sometimes it takes nine lives to save one
Starring: Luke Treadaway, Bob the Cat
Plot: Based on the international best selling book. The true feel good story of how James Bowen, a busker and recovering drug addict, had his life transformed when he met a stray ginger cat.
Running Time: 103 minutes

Chris: I can’t believe I am saying this, but I actually really want to see this one!
Jessica: A movie about a man and a cat…Okay, sure. This is truly a weird group of trailers this week.

Life on the Line (Lionsgate) – Action/Drama
Rated R for some violence/grisly images and brief strong language
Tag Line: Courage. Risk. Sacrifice.
Starring: John Travolta, Kate Bosworth, Devon Sawa, Sharon Stone
Plot: A crew of men who do the high-wire work of fixing the electrical grid are hit by a sudden deadly storm.
Running Time: 97 minutes

Jessica: So this is the Twister for Linemen, Cool. That’s fine. I respect linemen, this movie? I don’t think I’ll be seeing it.
Chris: Could make for a good rainy night viewing….pun very much intended.

Tickets Purchased: One for Fantastic Beasts (Jessica) and One for Nocturnal Animals (Chris)

Rejected cast member of Fantastic Beasts
Rejected cast member of Fantastic Beasts
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Trailer Snark (April 8th, 2016 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Last Week:  DC owned the box office again this past week in spite of a massive drop in ticket sales for Batman v Superman.  The dueling duo took in another $52.3M for a total domestic haul of $261.4M in its second week of release.  Zootopia placed second with $20M and $275.9M overall.  My Big fat Greek Wedding 2 placed third ($11.1M/$36.4M).  The highest debut came from fourth place God’s Not Dead 2, which managed $8.1M.  Miracles from Heaven was right behind in fifth ($7.5M/$46.8M).  The rest of the top ten went as follows:  Allegiant ($5.7M/$56.3M), 10 Cloverfield Ln ($4.7M/$63.5M), Meet the Blacks ($4M/NEW), Eye in the Sky ($4M/$6.1M), and Deadpool ($3.5M/$355.1M).  Let’s take a look at what is rolling into theaters this weekend….

Hardcore Henry (STX Entertainment) – Action/Sci-Fi
Rated R for non-stop bloody brutal violence and mayhem, language throughout, sexual content/nudity and drug use
Tag Line: First they made him dangerous.  Then they made him mad.
Starring:  Sharlto Copley, Tim Roth, Haley Bennett
Plot: A first-person action film from the eyes of Henry, who’s resurrected from death with no memory. He must discover his identity and save his wife from a warlord with a plan to bio-engineer soldiers.
Running Time: 96 minutes

Chris: Gosh, the first person camera movies are getting about as old as “reality” TV.
Jim: I swear that some people who make trailers try to figure out the best way to keep people like me away. Case in point.
Jessica: I can’t deal with this. It makes me seasick. Big pass.

The Boss (Universal Pictures) – Comedy
Rated R for sexual content, language and brief drug use
Tag Line: Watch your assets.
Starring: Melissa McCarthy, Kristen Bell
Plot: A titan of industry is sent to prison after she’s caught for insider trading. When she emerges ready to rebrand herself as America’s latest sweetheart, not everyone she screwed over is so quick to forgive and forget.
Running Time: 99 minutes

Jessica: I adore McCarthy so I would totally see this at home. Not a theater flick but she does tickle me.
Chris: Please fire me!
Jim: There might be a good movie in here, but you wouldn’t know it from this idiotic trailer.

Demolition (Fox Searchlight) – Comedy/Drama
Rated R for language, some sexual references, drug use and disturbing behavior
Tag Line: LIFE: Some Disassembly Required.
Starring: Jake Gyllenhaal, Naomi Watts, Chris Cooper
Plot: As an investment banker struggles after losing his wife in a tragic car crash, his increasingly confessional series of letters to a vending machine company catch the attention of a customer service rep with whom he forms an unlikely connection.
Running Time: 100 minutes

Jim: Jake Gyllenhaal is amazing, might be worth a look.
Jessica: Good actors, interesting premise. Not a theater viewing but I would watch this at home.
Chris: Intriguing method of channeling hurt.  Not sure my desire for the melancholy is high enough with spring dawning, but I’ll certainly give this a look down the road.

The Invitation (Drafthouse Films) – Horror/Thriller
Not Rated
Tag Line: There is nothing to be afraid of.
Starring: Logan Marshall-Green, Michiel Huisman
Plot: While attending a dinner party at his former home, a man thinks his ex-wife and her new husband have sinister intentions for their guests.
Running Time: 100 minutes

Chris: You had me at “hello, and welcome to my absolutely sinister home”!
Jim: Love house party movies, especially creepy ones like this.
Jessica: Interesting. I’d watch this at home, I like a good psychological thriller and this could be one.

Louder Than Bombs (The Orchard) – Drama
Rated R for language, some sexual content, nudity and violent images
Tag Line: Break the silence.
Starring: Jesse Eisenberg, Gabriel Byrne, Isabelle Huppert
Plot: The fractious family of a father and his two sons confront their different feelings and memories of their deceased wife and mother, a famed war photographer.
Running Time: 109 minutes

Jessica: Eh. That’s about all I felt, eh.
Chris: Jesse Eisenberg is really turning out to be a treat to watch on film.  While I wouldn’t say his presence commands an audience, his delivery sure as heck makes up for it!
Jim: Looks like an intriguing rental. Jesse Eisenberg helps, maybe he’ll redeem himself for his overacting in Batman Vs. Superman (yes, overacted even for an over-the-top villain).

Mr. Right (Focus World) – Action/Comedy/Romance
Rated R for violence and language throughout
Tag Line: They make a killer couple.
Starring: Anna Kendrick, Sam Rockewell
Plot: A girl falls for the “perfect” guy, who happens to have a very fatal flaw: he’s a hitman on the run from the crime cartels who employ him.
Running Time: 90 minutes

Jim: Wrong. Sorry, couldn’t resist.
Jessica: I simply adore Rockwell so I was sold right away.
Chris: Not a chance, even if it were called Mrs. Right.

Tickets Purchased: Two for The Invitation (Jim and Chris) and Jessica stays at home with a good book!

I think he is a glass half full kind of guy.
I think he is a glass half full kind of guy.
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Trailer Snark (July 24th Theatrical Releases)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Last Week: (Chris Comments) Something tells me that Rob may have missed the mark on his Ant-Man analysis last week….oh yeah,that something was my eyes, ears, heart, and the fist that went flying in the air in triumph after watching Marvel’s latest on the big screen this past weekend.  And it appears that Jessica, Ken, and I were not alone at its opening weekend as Ant-Man claimed first place with a $58 million haul.  Now, that may not seem so much considering the openings of most of Marvel’s films of late, but it could be great word of mouth that prevents a big second week drop-off.  Here is to hoping that some of those Pym Particles can boost up the box office returns Ant-Man so richly deserves.  Coming in at number two was Minions (my wife’s pick to be number one again this week) with another $50 million ($217 million overall),  Amy Schumer’s Trainwreck premiered in third place with $30 million.  A huge drop off in box office receipts after that with Inside Out and Jurassic World battling it out with just over $11 million a piece (Inside Out cracked $300 million and Jurassic World went over an astounding $600 million overall).  Terminator: Genisys, Magic Mike XXL, The Gallows, and Ted 2 were all next with the tenth spot occupied by the debut of Mr. Holmes.

Pixels (Columbia Pictures) – Comedy/Action/Sci-Fi
Rated PG-13 for some language and suggestive comments
Tag Line: Game On.
Starring: Adam Sandler, Kevin James, Peter Dinklage, Dan Akroyd, Michelle Monghan, Sean Bean, and more
Plot: When aliens misinterpret video feeds of classic arcade games as a declaration of war, they attack the Earth in the form of the video games.
Running Time: 105 minutes

Rob: Mindless fun based on the video games of our 8-bit youth.  Yeah, you heard me right you young whipersnappers only 8-bit!
Chris: Adam Sandler has been due for a hit…actually, he is due for a decent movie.  Pixels is certainly tapping into nostalgia for the forty-something crowd which could be a magnet to those parents who hope to make a connection with their video-game culture kids.
Ken: Rated M for middle aged. I don’t think the nostalgia factor will be enough to drive a thin premise for almost 2 hours and I’m afraid that the retro arcade references will be lost on younger audiences.  I love the spirit of this movie but I have a sneaking suspicion that it’s gonna suck.
Jessica: Actually this one surprised me, I might actually see this though Adam Sandler and Kevin James don’t fill me with confidence the story seems funny/interesting and it might actually be good. Or it could suck big time, hard to tell.

Southpaw (The Weinstein Company) – Drama/Action/Sports
Rated R for language throughout, and some violence
Tag Line: Believe in Hope.
Starring: Jake Gyllenhaal, Rachel McAdams, Forest Whitaker, and Curtis Jackson
Plot: Boxer Billy Hope turns to trainer Tick Willis to help him get his life back on track after losing his wife in a tragic accident and his daughter to child protection services.
Running Time: 123 minutes

Jessica: So all over this one! I’m a fan of Gyllenhaal and I love a good boxing/redemption story.
Ken: This is essentially a vehicle for Eminem to promote himself. That’s his name on the title track, his boy Fitty acting in it, and his life story being told, except he’s a boxer in the movie. Metaphors like metafives.
Chris: It’s Jacked Gyllenhaal vs the System as a parent coping with family tragedy, dangerous career, and questionable life choices.  After his total creep turn in Nightcrawler, I find myself interested in Jake’s movie roles.
Rob: Looks promising if it can focus more on the main character’s  ambitions as a father instead of those of a boxer.

The Vatican Tapes (Lionsgate) – Horror
Rated PG-13 for disturbing violent content, and some sexual references
Tag Line: For 2,000 years the Vatican has recorded evidence of evil. May God have mercy on their souls.
Starring: Michael Pena, Kathleen Robinson, Dougray Scott, Djimon Housou, and Olivia Taylor Dudley
Plot: A priest and two Vatican exorcists must do battle with an ancient satanic force to save the soul of a young woman.
Running Time: 91 minutes

Chris: After seeing Michael Pena in his goofy role in Ant-Man, this is quite the departure as he plays a priest who may be trying to exorcise the Anti-Christ.  The last image in the trailer recalls the ever so skincrawling Prince of Darkness from the great John Carpenter.
Rob: Horror.  Religion.  Couldn’t be less interested.
Jessica: At first I was very “meh” about this one but there are some good actors in this film and it COULD be an interesting take on the whole exorcism thing. Doesn’t look scary at all but more intriguing. I wouldn’t see in a theater but I’d watch it on Amazon or Netflix for sure.
Ken: Religious horror fascinates me because demonic possessions are recorded events. These things actually happen. This movie however looks fake beyond belief. Not a good sign when the trailer doesn’t scare you.

Paper Towns (20th Century Fox) – Drama/Mystery
Rated PG-13 for some language, drinking, sexuality and partial nudity – all involving teens
Tag Line: Get Lost. Get Found.
Starring: Cara Delevingne and Nat Wolff
Plot: A young man and his friends embark upon the road trip of their lives to find the missing girl next door.
Running Time: 109 minutes

Ken: Romantic optimism battles the rebellious, cynicism of youth. Being young was awful, so many conflicting feelings to process. I’m so glad I grew out of it. But I like to remember it fondly.
Jessica: BORING. BORING. BORING. The trailer bores me, I actually have seen it a couple times now before movies and I’m all sorts of set. Teen drama, blah blah blah. I think I’d rather watch anything other than this. Oh wait, I still have to talk about Smoosh. Hold please.
Chris: It’s a coming of age film filled with mystery and possibilities for, especially for a young man who just wanted to be noticed by the girl of his dreams.  Looks like a winner.
Rob: Jogn Green can write and this looks like a fun ride complete with mystery and a search for greater purpose.

Smosh: The Movie (Lionsgate) – Comedy
Rated PG-13 for crude and sexual humor, language, some drug content and violence
Tag Line: Based on the YouTube channel “Smosh” launched by Ian Andrew Hecox and Anthony Padilla in 2005.
Starring: Ian Andrew Hecox and Anthony Padilla
Plot: An embarrassing video of Anthony surfaces online right before his fifth high school reunion. The Smosh dudes then race to pull down the clip before it blows Anthony’s chances of reconnecting with his teen crush Anna.
Running Time: 84 minutes

Jessica: Smosh or Smoosh or whatever it is: NO THANK YOU. I’d rather watch Paper Towns. On repeat, for days.
Chris: Weak….just weak.
Rob: It’s like Bill & Ted took a portal into Youtube only 10,000 times more poorly executed.  Just no.
Ken: I’m probably dating myself horribly when I say this, but I don’t know what a Smosh is or what is going on with this movie. 

American Heist (Lionsgate) – Action/Crime/Drama
Rated R for strong violence, pervasive language, some sexual material and brief drug use
Tag Line: N/A
Starring: Adrien Brody, Hayden Christensen, Jordana Brewster, and Akon
Plot: James owes his life to his older brother, Frankie after taking the rap for a crime they committed together. While Frankie served time, James worked to turn his life around, got a steady job and began courting his former girlfriend Emily. Now, Frankie is released and back on the streets with no money and no place to go.
Running Time: 94 minutes

Rob: Thought it might be decent, then I heard Hayden Christensen use a whiny tone of voice.  I’m out.
Ken: The word cliché gets thrown around a lot in this forum.  
Chris: Lionsgate with three movies in one week?  In spite of Hayden Christensen, this movie looks like a good time at the theater.  Adrian Brody is on board, speaking of actors who truly need a successful movie, as he plays a seriously troubled young man who owes favors to all the wrong people.
Jessica: Eh. I like Adrian Brody but this story has been done to death and seriously, Jordana Brewster, stop doing car/heist movies! Yeesh.

Unexpected (The Film Arcade) – Drama
Rated R for language
Tag Line: No one is ever really prepared.
Starring: Cobie Smulders and Gail Bean
Plot: An inner-city high school teacher discovers she is pregnant at the same time as one of her most promising students and the two develop an unlikely friendship while struggling to navigate their unexpected pregnancies.
Running Time: 90 minutes

Ken: The working title for this film was Stand and Delivering Babies.
Rob: A teacher and one of her students both become unexpectedly pregnant and explore the consequences of their choices.  Something maybe they should have thought about first…maybe the film will help some folks do just that.
Chris: Cobie Smothers plays a teacher who finds herself striking a special relationship with one of her students as they both become pregnant.  It looks like a big screen Lifetime movie…..yawn.

Tickets Purchased:  2 for Paper Towns (Ken and Chris) and 2 for Southpaw (Rob and Jessica)

Remember when Jake couldn't punch his way out of a plastic bag?
Remember when Jake couldn’t punch his way out of a plastic bag?
I Ain't No Bubble Boy No More!
I Ain’t No Bubble Boy No More!

What will you be watching this week?
-The Great Stories Team