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Trailer Snark (December 15, 2018 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Eric from View from Above, Robert from Cards and Counters, Wayne from The Dope Sheet, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi (Disney) – Action/Advernture/Sci-Fi
Rated PG-13 for sequences of sci-fi action and violence.
Tag Line: None
Starring: Daisy Ridley, John Boyega, Oscar Isaac, Adam Driver
Plot: Rey develops her newly discovered abilities with the guidance of Luke Skywalker, who is unsettled by the strength of her powers. Meanwhile, the Resistance prepares to do battle with the First Order.
Running Time: 152 minutes

Rob F: It’s finally here!!! We’re going to get some answers about Luke, Rey, and Snoke! We’re going to build on the greatest entertainment franchise in the history of mankind. This is way better than Christmas! Fan event tickets for Thursday’s first showing are locked and loaded on IMAX. May the Force be with you…
Chris: The reinvigorated franchise is back with the middle frame of its latest trilogy, and throngs of Star Wars faithful will never be the same.  Every movie is an event in and of itself.  Let the debate begin on the result.

Ferdinand (20th Century Fox Animation) – Animation/Adventure/Comedy
Rated PG for rude humor, action and some thematic elements
Tag Line: This Christmas, BULL-ieve.
Starring: John Cena, Kate McKinnon, Bobby Canavale
Plot: After Ferdinand, a bull with a big heart, is mistaken for a dangerous beast, he is captured and torn from his home. Determined to return to his family, he rallies a misfit team on the ultimate adventure.
Running Time: 106 minutes

Chris: With this week’s purchase of Fox’s film rights, don’t we technically consider this one a Disney Film?  Is there a princess in it anywhere?  Is John Cena the princess?  Will John Cena now visit my house to bodyslam me through my coffee table?  News at 11.
Rob F: Looks mediocre, but will probably end up watching it as a rental with my youngest down the road.  

Permanent (Magnolia) – Comedy
Rated PG-13 for crude sexual references, language and thematic elements
Tag Line: Hairstyles are temporary. Families are forever.
Starring: Patricia Arquette, Rainn Wilson, Kira McLean
Plot: Permanent is a comedy about bad hair, adolescence, and socially awkward family members. It involves life-altering permanents and poorly-made toupees. Obstacles to daily survival ensue.
Running Time: 93 minutes

Rob F: Hard pass. If this were a magazine I would not be a subscriber.
Chris: I wouldn’t buy a ticket with Rob’s wallet.

Beyond Skyline (Vertical Entertainment) – Action/Adventure/Horror
Rated R for sequences of bloody sci-fi violence, and language throughout.
Tag Line: None
Starring: Frank Grillo, Bojana Novakovic, Iko Uwais
Plot: A tough-as-nails detective embarks on a relentless pursuit to free his son from a nightmarish alien warship.
Running Time: 105 minutes

Chris:  I hadn’t even heard of this one before seeing the news of its release this week.  But it looks to me like a fun little theater outing.  Frank Grillo is bad*ss.
Rob F: I would probably enjoy renting this. It’s got no chance at the box office though.

Tickets Purchased:  Two for Star Wars….like it was a contest.