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Trailer Snark (May 26, 2017 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Eric from View from Above, Robert from Cards and Counters, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales (Disney) – Adventure/Fantasy
Rated PG-13 for sequences of adventure violence, and some suggestive content
Tag Line: None
Starring: Johnny Depp, Geoffrey Rush, Javier Bardem
Plot: Captain Jack Sparrow searches for the trident of Poseidon.
Running Time: 129 minutes

Chris: I’m ready to dust off that bottle of rum and raise that jolly roger.  Jack Sparrow is back!
Robert: Really….. Another One?….. I say that as I look at show times for this weekend.
Jim: I know, another one—but my daughter loves them, I like them, and I love movies that I can enjoy with my daughter.

Baywatch (Paramount) – Action/Comedy/Drama
Rated R for language throughout, crude sexual content, and graphic nudity
Tag Line: Go ahead and stare.
Starring: Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson, Alexandra Daddario, Zac Effron
Plot: Devoted lifeguard Mitch Buchanan butts heads with a brash new recruit. Together, they uncover a local criminal plot that threatens the future of the Bay.
Running Time: 116 minutes

Jim: Never watched the show, but worth a rental. In other words, see-worthy. Heh heh.
Chris:  like The Rock, but I remember that moment when David Hasselhoff became uncool when I was a youngster.  When he traded in the leather jacket for the orange trunks.
Robert: (eye roll) You mean to tell me that a life guard is so proud of his job that he going to act like an FBI agent? Get outta here.

Long Strange Trip (Amazon Studios) – Documentary
Rated R for drug content throughout, language and some graphic nudity
Tag Line: The untold story of the Grateful Dead.
Starring: You know who.
Plot: The tale of the Grateful Dead is inspiring, complicated, and downright messy. A tribe of contrarians, they made art out of open-ended chaos and inadvertently achieved success on their own terms. Never-before-seen footage and interviews offer this unprecedented and unvarnished look at the life of the Dead.
Running Time: 238 minutes

Robert: I like music history. I took a lot of music classes in college, so I enjoy documentaries on anything music. But I’m glad Amazon Prime… I don’t have to pay for it. That is if I remember to stream it.
Jim: Not a big fan of the band, so gets a blank, hazy,  stare from me.
Chris: Not a fan of this band, so my interest is Dead on Arrival.

Drone (Screen Media Films) – Thriller
Not Rated
Tag Line: Choose your targets wisely.
Starring: Sean Bean, Mary McCormack, Patrick Sabongui
Plot: Ideologies collide with fatal results when a military drone contractor meets an enigmatic Pakistani businessman.
Running Time: 91 minutes

Chris: Could be an entertaining thriller, but not enough to get me to the theater.  Will Sean Bean lose his head again?  Stay tuned.
Robert: I can see this being a roller coaster of emotions. Sean Bean is just one of those ones where you gotta like whatever he’s in. But I will save this one for the small screen.
Jim: Kind of like Patriot Games, but this time Sean Bean’s the good guy.

Tickets Purchased: 3 for Pirates of the Caribbean!

C'mon, that was punny!
C’mon, that was punny!
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Trailer Snark (September 2, 2016 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Last Week: Horror entry Don’t Breathe scared up $26.1M in its debut to take hold of the tops at the box office last weekend.  The only other movie to break double digits was Suicide Squad at number two ($12.1M/$282.8M).  Kubo and the Two Strings was third ($7.9M/$24.9M), Sausage Party in fourth ($7.6M/$80M), and Mechanic Resurrection debuted at number five with $7.5M.  The rest of the list went as follows:  Pete’s Dragon ($7.2M/$54.7M), War Dogs ($7.2M/$27.7), Bad Moms ($5.7M/$95.4M), Jason Bourne ($5.2M/$149.3M), and Ben-Hur ($4.5M/$19.5M).  Let’s check out this week’s new releases!

The Light Between Oceans (Walt Disney) – Drama
Rated PG-13 for thematic material and some sexual content
Tag Line: Love demands everything.
Starring:  Michael Fassbender, Alicia Vikander, Rachel Weisz
Plot: A lighthouse keeper and his wife living off the coast of Western Australia raise a baby they rescue from an adrift rowboat.
Running Time: 132 minutes

Chris: That was quite a moving trailer.  Heartbreaking subject matter…prepare thyself.
Jessica: Looks compelling, but all the trailer did was make me want to read the book and not watch the movie till I’d done so.
Ken: Wow, heavy subject matter.  Looks heart wrenching, Maybe for home.

Morgan (Twentieth Century Fox) – Horror/Thriller
Rated R for brutal violence, and some language
Tag Line: Don’t Let It Out
Starring:  Kate Mara, Paul Giamatti, Rose Leslie
Plot: A corporate risk-management consultant must decide whether or not to terminate an artificially created humanoid being.
Running Time: 92 minutes

Ken: I’d rather revisits Stranger Things for the fourth time.
Chris: Decent enough looking thriller….just not good enough to get me to the theater, especially with Netflix’ Stranger Things still so fresh in my mind.
Jessica: Eh. Could be really good, but Eleven rocks way more than this Morgan person. Can’t trust a kid with powers that doesn’t like waffles.

31 (Saban Films) – Horror
Rated R for strong bloody horror violence, pervasive language, sexual content and drug use
Tag Line: A Rob Zombie Film.
Starring: Elizabeth Daily, Malcolm McDowell, Meg Foster
Plot: Five carnival workers are kidnapped and held hostage in an abandoned, Hell-like compound where they are forced to participate in a violent game, the goal of which is to survive twelve hours against a gang of sadistic clowns.
Running Time: 102 minutes

Jessica: I love Rob Zombie. Even Lords of Salem (to me) wasn’t all bad. Though I very much dislike Halloween II. All his other films are fantastic. This has that same potential. I’d totally see it, especially leading into my favorite season, Halloween!
Ken: So that’s where the Joker shops for henchmen. Rob Zombie flick so you know it’s going to disturbing to the max.
Chris: Zombie’s last film Lords of Salem was a catastrophe.  I am going to be approaching this one with all caution.

The 9th Life of Louis Drax (Summit Premiere) – Mystery/Thriller
Rated R for some disturbing images and brief strong language
Tag Line: A mystery beyond reality.
Starring: Jamie Dornan, Sarah Gadon
Plot: A psychologist who begins working with a young boy who has suffered a near-fatal fall finds himself drawn into a mystery that tests the boundaries of fantasy and reality.
Running Time: 108 minutes

Chris: OK, now this is a mystery/thriller that might get me off the couch!  Aja is a capable director too.
Jessica: Looks alright, I’d watch this at home though. Definitely not a theater film.
Ken: That was essentially the first three episodes of Game of Thrones.

Yoga Hosers (Invincible Pictures) – Comedy/Horror
Rated PG-13 for crude humor, sexual references, comic violence, and brief drug material
Tag Line: Do your ‘wurst…
Starring: Harley Quinn Smith, Lily-Rose Depp, Johnny Depp, Justin long
Plot: Two teenage yoga enthusiasts team up with a legendary man-hunter to battle with an ancient evil presence that is threatening their major party plans.
Running Time: 88 minutes

Ken: I have a weakness for Kevin Smith movies but this looks like a pretty lame vehicle to launch his and Depp’s daughters’ movie careers.
Chris: Kevin Smith’s move towards off-beat horror has yielded mixed results.  Red State was terrible, but Tusk was surprisingly twisted good.  This one features characters from the latter, but the trailer looked pretty low rent.
Jessica: I didn’t even make it through the trailer. I really think Kevin Smith has lost it. After that damn Walrus movie I just can’t see what he’s thinking anymore. BIG pass on this one.

White Girl (FilmRise) – Drama
Not rated
Tag Line: None
Starring: Morgan Saylor, Justin Bartha
Plot: Summer, New York City. A college girl falls hard for a guy she just met. After a night of partying goes wrong, she goes to wild extremes to get him back.
Running Time: 88 minutes

Jessica: It’s big shoes to fill to say it’s as good as “Kids”, not sure it can live up to that, but I’d give this a watch at home.
Chris: Druggie girl debauchery.  Pass.
Ken: Druggie girl debauchery. Pass… the popcorn.

Max Rose (Paladin) – Drama/Comedy
Not Rated
Tag Line: The legend is back.
Starring: Jerry Lewis, Kerry Bishe, Kevin Pollak
Plot: A jazz pianist makes a discovery days before the death of his wife that causes him to believe his sixty-five year marriage was a lie. He embarks on an exploration of his own past that brings him face to face with a menagerie of characters from a bygone era.
Running Time: 83 minutes

Ken: I think it’s a universal truth that the older you get the more you appreciate the wisdom of the elderly.
Jessica: I wouldn’t see a movie just because “The legend Jerry Lewis” is in it, but I would see this because the story looks to be quite touching and well done. I’m a sucker for long-term loves and learning lessons and all that.
Chris: Have to say that after all this time, seeing Jerry Lewis make it back to the big screen has a certain appeal.  Charming trailer for the Rat Pack member.

Tickets Purchased: Two for 31 (Jessica and Ken) and One for The 9th Life of Louis Drax (Chris)

Remember the fun times we had at the carnival before Rob Zombie and his goons tortured us?
Remember the fun times we had at the carnival before Rob Zombie and his goons tortured us?
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Trailer Snark (May 27, 2016 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Last Week: It may be shocking to some, but Angry Birds took perch at the top of the box office with $39M last weekend.  Captain America: Civil War was bumped to second with $33.1M and now $347.9M overall. Two other debuts occupied the third and fourth slots with Neighbors making $21.7M and The Nice Guys taking in $11.2M.  Jungle Book closed out the top five with $11M and $327.4M overall.  The rest of the top ten went like this:  Money Monster ($7M/$27.1M), The Darkness ($2.3M/$8.4M), Zootopia ($1.7M/$334.4M), The Huntsman ($1.1M/$46.6M), and Mother’s Day ($1.1M/$31.2M).  This week is a light schedule but a very hefty entry……

X-Men:  Apocalypse (Twentieth Century Fox) – Action/Adventure/Sci-Fi
Rated PG-13 for sequences of violence, action and destruction, brief strong language and some suggestive images
Tag Line: Destroy
Starring: James McAvoy, Michael Fassbender, Jennifer Lawrence, Nicholas Hoult
Plot: With the emergence of the world’s first mutant, Apocalypse, the X-Men must unite to defeat his extinction level plan.
Running Time: 144 minutes

Jim: It’s an X-Men movie. Of COURSE I’m gonna see it. Even the weaker ones (The Last Stand, First Class) are worth seeing.
Ken: I’d never miss an X-Men movie, and my excitement has been growing exponentially with each new trailer. Rumors are the Apocalypse movie will setup my favorite X-Men story of all time, the Dark Phoenix Saga.
Chris: Like I would miss a Marvel-related film?  The only big question for me is, “do we get to see Old Man Logan?”
Jessica: A big pass from me. Not a huge fan of what Singer has done in the X-men universe and this one looks pretty blah to me. Which stinks because you know  I LOVE a Marvel movie! I’ll check this one out at home when it’s cheaper and/or free!

Alice Through the Looking Glass (Disney) – Adventure/Family/Fantasy
Rated PG for fantasy action/peril and some language
Tag Line: This spring, it’s time for a little madness.
Starring:  Johnny Depp, Mia Wasikowska, Helena Bonham Carter
Plot: Alice returns to the whimsical world of Wonderland and travels back in time to save the Mad Hatter.
Running Time: 113 minutes

Jessica: I liked the first one, not love, and this one is only okay looking. An at-home viewer for sure.
Jim: The first, Tim-Burton directed Alice in Wonderland was a charmless CGI snooze. He’s not directing this one, but it doesn’t look much different than the first.
Ken: Burton really missed the mark with the Alice remakes. I enjoyed his adaptation of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory because it was true to the source material. Not the case with Alice, which only superficially resembles the Lewis Carroll classic, trading in the whimsy and wonder for slapstick and CGI.
Chris: I didn’t see the first, and I am not likely to see this one.  I still prefer Tom Petty’s iteration.

The Ones Below (Magnet) – Thriller
Rated R for language, some sexuality and nudity
Tag Line: How well do you know your neighbors?
Starring: Clemence Poesy, David Morrisey
Plot: A couple expecting their first child discover an an unnerving difference between themselves and the couple living in the flat below them who are also having a baby.
Running Time: 87 minutes

Chris: After seeing The Burbs this week, my appetite for crazy neighbors has suddenly sky-rocketed.  I’ll check it out!
Jessica: Looks interesting!
Jim: Looks good and Roman-Polanski creepy.
Ken: Ick, creepy, There’s something about babies in peril that immediately ramps up the anxiety level to eleven.

Tickets Purchased:  Three for X-Men: Apocalypse (Ken, Jim, and Chris) and Jessica takes in another viewing of Civil War.

Apocalypse...the first mutant...done by the legendary Skotty Young
Apocalypse…the first mutant…done by the legendary Skotty Young
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Trailer Snark (September 18 2015 Theatrical Releases)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Last Week: It was a dogfight for the top spot at the box office this past weekend but in the end, The Perfect Guy ($26.7M) edged out The Visit ($25.6M).  While these are not staggering numbers, both films have already turned big profits thanks to their low budgets.  War Room, last week’s number one, dropped to number three with $7.4M in receipts ($39M overall).  The rest of the field scored under $5M in box office and landed in the following order:  A Walk in the Woods, Mission Impossible Rogue Nation, Straight Outta Compton, No Escape, The Transporter Refueled, the debuting 90 Minutes in Heaven, and the foreign film Un Gallo Con Muchos Huevos.  There is no doubt, however, that by next week we will be crowning a new box office champion with some serious contenders vying for the honors.  Let’s take a look!

Everest (Universal) – Adventure/Drama/Thriller
Rated PG-13 for intense peril and disturbing images
Tag Line: Never let go
Starring:  Josh Brolin, Jason Clarke, Keira Knightley, Jake Gyllenhaal, Sam Worthington, and Emily Watson.
Plot: A climbing expedition on Mt. Everest is devastated by a severe snow storm.
Running Time: 121 minutes

Jessica: I have a mild to moderate obsession with Mt. Everest so I actually have seen another movie (though the name eludes me) about this exact Everest disaster – it’s a very compelling story and a very tragically sad one. This looks really good, great actors (I love me some Brolin) and hopefully does a good job with respecting the individual stories of that day on the mountain. Either way, it’s right up my Everest alley.
Ken: I’m petrified of heights. I get vertigo watching this trailer on my laptop screen. Windowed. The effects look insane, this might be the one to watch in theaters.
Rob: One of the penultimate man versus nature tales, and it looks like a good one.
Chris: My life group is discussing pushing the limitations of what we believe possible, and I can think of no better physical example than those that brave the perilous journey to the top of Mount Everest.  The movie looks beautiful, terrifying, and riveting.  Can’t miss it.

Maze Runner:  The Scorch Trials (Twentieth Century Fox) – Action/Drama
Rated PG-13 for extended sequences of violence and action, some thematic elements, substance use and language
Tag Line: The maze was just the beginning
Starring: Dylan O’Brien, Kaya Scodelario, and Thomas Brodie-Sangster
Plot: After having escaped the Maze, the Gladers now face a new set of challenges on the open roads of a desolate landscape filled with unimaginable obstacles.
Running Time: 131 minutes

Ken: Never read the books, didn’t watch the first movie, wasn’t planning on seeing the second one either but the trailer for Scorch Trails was entertaining. I’ll give it a look down the road when it comes to homes.
Chris: The first movie was decent enough, especially when measured against its teen drama contemporaries, but it is just not my choice cup of tea.  Particularly in the face of such other strong competition this week.  Consider it a rental for me.
Jessica: I read the series that these books are based on and I’ll say this, they were wickedly entertaining and the first movie did a bang-on job with getting the story right. i have a lot of faith that this one will follow its lead.

Black Mass (Warner Bros) – Biography/Crime/Drama
Rated R for brutal violence, language throughout, some sexual references and brief drug use
Tag Line: Based on the true story of one of the most notorious gangsters in U.S. history
Starring: Johnny Depp, Benedict Cumberbatch, Kevin Bacon, Dakota Johnson, and Joel Edgerton.
Plot: The true story of Whitey Bulger, the brother of a state senator and the most infamous violent criminal in the history of South Boston, who became an FBI informant to take down a Mafia family invading his turf.
Running Time: 122 minutes

Chris: Looks well-acted.  Its a dark story for those of us who have grown up in the Boston area.  Movies such as this run the risk of glamorizing the monster, which I hope the filmmakers manage to avoid.
Jessica: Oh man, there aren’t enough excited adjectives to express how excited I am about this movie. I have total faith that Johnny Depp is going to rock this role, can’t wait!
Ken: Before Disney and that unfortunate late Burton phase, Johnny Depp was considered one of the great American actors of our generation. He’s back to playing serious character roles and the results look spectacular. Black Mass has the makings of a classic gangster film.

Sicario (Lionsgate) – Action/Crime/Drama
Rated R for strong violence, grisly images, and language
Tag Line: The border is just another line to cross.
Starring: Josh Brolin, Emily Blunt, Benicio Del Toro, and Jon Bernthal
Plot: An idealistic FBI agent is enlisted by an elected government task force to aid in the escalating war against drugs at the border area between the U.S. and Mexico.
Running Time: 121 minutes

Jessica: I was pleasantly surprised that this trailer looks actually quite interesting (and can we say Brolin again!?!?!). I love Del Toro and Emily Blunt is also a fave of mine. I say this looks like a total win.
Ken: Watched the trailer twice and still have no idea what this is going on, other than drug cartels are crazy. Great cast, but is all that star power enough to get me to lay down cash for this movie? As they say in Mexico, no.
Chris: Which Josh Brolin film do I want to see this week?  Sicario looks like incredible cinema to me.  Going to be a tough choice.

Captive (Paramount) – Crime/Drama
Rated PG-13 for mature thematic elements involving violence and substance abuse
Tag Line: Faith. Redemption. Survival.
Starring:  Kate Mara, David Oyelowo, and Mimi RogersPlot: A single mother struggling with drug addiction is taken hostage in her own apartment by a man on the run after breaking out of jail and murdering the judge assigned to his case.
Running Time: 97 minutes

Ken: A formulaic movie that pulls double duty as marketing vehicle for Rick Warren’s devotional, self-help book, The Purpose Driven Life.  
Chris: They should have called the movie by another version of the word.  Captivating.  Two broken people…will they be saved?  I’ll be tuning in.
Jessica: Hmmm … I’m back and forth on this one. Partly sickly sweet, party interesting. I’ll probably catch it online after it’s release.

Pawn Sacrifice (Bleecker Street Media) – Biography/Drama
Rated PG-13 for brief strong language, some sexual content and historical smoking
Tag Line: In 1972, Bobby Fischer faced the Soviet Union in the greatest chess match ever played. On the board he fought the Cold War. In his mind he fought his madness.
Starring:  Tobey Maguire and Liev Schrieber
Plot: Set during the Cold War, American chess prodigy Bobby Fischer finds himself caught between two superpowers and his own struggles as he challenges the Soviet Empire.
Running Time: 114 minutes

Chris: I wonder at how closely the story follows reality.  Color me intrigued. Big fan of Liev Schrieber.
Jessica: I have a massive case of Toby McGuire dislike. I don’t know if it’s because he was Spiderman and I hate spiders and therefore am not a huge fan of Spiderman (yeah, I know it makes no sense, shush) or what but this one kind of leaves me feeling blah. Could be it’s about chess and I could not possibly care less about chess and Bobby Fisher.
Ken: Might ‘check’ it out.

About Ray (Weinstein Company) – Drama/Comedy
Not Rated
Tag Line: A family in transition.
Starring: Naomi Watts, Elle Fanning, and Susan Sarandon
Plot: After Ray decides to transition from female to male, Ray’s mother, Maggie, must come to terms with the decision while tracking down Ray’s biological father to get his legal consent.
Running Time: 87 minutes

Jessica: I LOVE that they are making more movies about transgender and a transgender teen? Awesome on top of awesome. This has a powerhouse cast and looks uplifting and sad and everything it should be. I’ll watch it on DVD or on Amazon or Netflix.
Ken: Pass. But I’m rooting for it.
Chris: Seems like a pretty heartfelt movie.  Not my typical style, but I will check it out when it hits the small screen.

Tickets Purchased: 3 for Everest (Ken, Jessica, and Rob), 1 for Sicario (Chris), and 1 for Black Mass (Jessica on double movie duty).

Ken braves the heights and bumbles on his way to Everest's peak!
Ken braves the heights and bumbles on his way to Everest’s peak!