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Trailer Snark (August 11, 2017 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Eric from View from Above, Robert from Cards and Counters, Wayne from The Dope Sheet, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Annabelle: Creation (Warner Bros) – Horror/Mystery/Thriller
Rated R for horror violence and terror.
Tag Line: You don’t know the real story.
Starring: Stephanie Sigman, Miranda Otto
Plot: Several years after the tragic death of their little girl, a dollmaker and his wife welcome a nun and several girls from a shuttered orphanage into their home, soon becoming the target of the dollmaker’s possessed creation, Annabelle.
Running Time: 109 minutes

Wayne: I’m selling this movie. Uses so many tricks to get a jump out of you. I’m not a fan of giving a doll an origin story. 
Chris: Am I alone in not knowing that Annabelle was tied to the Conjuring series? Well, this is no Conjuring from what I have seen.
Jessica: I LOVE the Conjuring, and the sequel was okay, this looks like a big pile of poo.
Jim: Jim Asleep

The Glass Castle (Lionsgate) – Bigoraphy/Drama
Rated PG-13 for mature thematic content involving family dysfunction, and for some language and smoking
Tag Line: Home goes wherever we go.
Starring: Woody Harrelson, Brie Larson
Plot: A young girl comes of age in a dysfunctional family of nonconformist nomads with a mother who’s an eccentric artist and an alcoholic father who would stir the children’s imagination with hope as a distraction to their poverty.
Running Time: 127 minutes

Jim: Woody is awesome, but I was beaten a little too much with the Inspirational Movie Stick during the trailer.
Wayne: I’m selling this movie. A story that isn’t going to get us anywhere. I like the casting, but don’t believe this to be worth seeing in a theater.
Chris: Wake me when it’s over.
Jessica: I LOVE Woody Harrelson but this looks like a great film to take a nap to.

The Nut Job 2: Nutty By Nature (Open Road Films) – Animation/Family
Rated PG for action and some rude humor
Tag Line: Get ready. Get set.  Get nuts!
Starring: Will Arnett, Katherine Heigl, Jackie Chan
Plot: Following the events of the first film, Surly and his friends must stop Oakton City’s mayor from destroying their home to make way for a dysfunctional amusement park.
Running Time: 91 minutes

Jessica: I don’t even have the words for how stupid this looks. Oh wait, I do, it looks stupid.
Jim: Was the first one even a hit? I remember seeing the trailer for the first one and hoping my daughter didn’t ask me to take her to see it. Mercifully, she didn’t. Man, this is one lame summer for movies.
Wayne: I’m selling this movie. Only a week out and now we’re seeing the push for this movie? Also opening late in the summer tells me they don’t have confidence in the film and neither do I.  
Chris: This first felt like a direct to DVD family film. I suspect this will be no better.

The Only Living Boy in New York (Roadside Attractions) – Drama
Rated R for adult situations
Tag Line: None
Starring: Jeff Bridge, Pierce Brosnan, Callum Turner, Kate Beckinsale
Plot: Adrift in New York City, a recent college graduate’s life is upended by his father’s mistress.
Running Time: 88 minutes

Chris: Mildly interesting, if only for Beckinsale and Bridges. Could be a good choice for the small screen.
Jessica: Pretentious drivel. I do enjoy Jeff Bridges, but you’d have to pay me to see this in theaters, or at home.
Jim: The good cast makes it a possible rental.
Wayne: I’m buying this. An interesting story and hey, it has KATE! 

The Trip to Spain (IFC Films) – Comedy/Drama
Not Rated
Tag Line:  The two amigos are back.
Starring: Steve Coogan, Rob Brydon
Plot: Steve Coogan and Rob Brydon embark on a six-part episodic road trip through Spain, sampling the restaurants, eateries, and sights along the way.
Running Time: 108 minutes

Wayne: I’m buying this. While the ladies of the summer have had their share of girl only fun, time for the guys to get their chance with some old fart trip to Spain. Interesting story and will check it out.
Chris: I still have not seen the first two movies, but this one looks like a good reason to hunt it down quickly.
Jessica: I didn’t see the first two either Chris, but this looks fun, as do the ones that came before.
Jim: The Trip, The Trip to Italy, and now this. I thought the first two were a blast, this looks to be the same. Picturesque locations, great-looking food, and some witty bantering from these two likable comedians (love the Roger Moore bit). If only more movies were as enjoyable on a simple level as these are.

Tickets Purchased: Three for The trip to Spain (Wayne, Chris, and Jim) and One for The Only Living Boy in New York (Wayne) while Jessica gets caught up with a viewing of Dunkirk.

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Trailer Snark (January 6, 2017 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

And now to kick off 2017!

Underworld: Blood Wars (Screen Gems) – Action/Horror
Rated R for strong bloody violence, and some sexuality
Tag Line: Protect the bloodline.
Starring: Kate Beckinsale, Theo James
Plot: Vampire death dealer, Selene (Kate Beckinsale) fights to end the eternal war between the Lycan clan and the Vampire faction that betrayed her.
Running Time: 91 minutes

Jessica: I think they need to stop with these movies. The first one was great, but they kind of lost me after. I think I was bored with the endless gun battles. They’re vampires and werewolves, they should have freakin MYSTICAL powers, why do they need so many guns!!!!!????
Jim: I was so bored by this trailer I could barely remember it 10 seconds after I watched it.
Chris: I liked the original, but the sequels have left me cold.  And I can’t help but think of Milla Jovovich from Resident Evil when I see Kate Beckinsale do her butt kicking in leather bit.  Wait for the small screen!

A Monster Calls (Focus Features) – Drama/Fantasy
Rated PG-13 for thematic content and some scary images
Tag Line: Stories are wild creatures.
Starring: Sigourney Weaver, Felicity Jones, Lewis MacDougall
Plot: A boy seeks the help of a tree monster to cope with his single mom’s terminal illness.
Running Time: 108 minutes
Chris: It’s about time that Liam Neeson does the taking.  This flick seems to be a nice escape from the post-Christmas winter blues.
Jessica: This really looks fantastic. I was intrigued, I admit it. Totally something I’d watch.
Jim: This looks like a winner for sure, captivating and magical.

I, Daniel Blake (Sundance Selects) – Drama
Rated R for language
Tag Line: None
Starring: Dave Johns, Hayley Squires
Plot: A middle aged carpenter who requires state welfare after injuring himself, is joined by a single mother in a similar scenario.
Running Time: 100 minutes

Jim: Wow, does this look gripping! I’d rush out and see it now if I didn’t think I’d spend 2 hours sitting there and getting pissed off.
Chris: I feel the righteous anger awakening.
Jessica: As great as Daniel Blake looks, I’m not really sure that I’d get much pleasure out of it. On a pure enjoyment level, I’d go with A Monster Calls. Happy New Year!

Tickets Purchased:  3 for A Monster Calls!

A Unanimous Trailer Snark Decision!
A Unanimous Trailer Snark Decision!
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Trailer Snark (September 9, 2016 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Your trailer snark now comes with more thrills and less fill!  Let’s get right down to it!

Sully (Warner Bros.) – Drama/Biography
Rated PG-13 for some peril and brief strong language
Tag Line: The untold story behind the miracle on the Hudson.
Starring:  Tom Hanks, Aaron Eckhart
Plot: Story of the man who became a hero after gliding his plane along the water in the Hudson River, saving all of the airplane flights 155 crew and passengers.
Running Time: 95 minutes

Chris: Eastwood and Hanks = Instant Winner
Jessica: If anyone can do this role justice, it’s Hanks. I honestly didn’t realize that the real Sully went through so much after the landing, looks interesting, but a home viewer for me
Ken: Could Tom Hanks be our greatest national treasure? If anyone else was playing the lead, I would have given this a pass.

When the Bough Breaks (Screen Gems) – Drama/Horror/Mystery
Rated PG-13 for violence, sexuality/partial nudity, thematic elements, some disturbing images, and language
Tag Line: She’s carrying more than just a secret.
Starring: Morris Chestnut, Regina Hall
Plot: A surrogate mom for a couple becomes dangerously obsessed with the soon-to-be father.
Running Time: 107 minutes

Ken: Move along. Nothing new to see here.
Chris: I will not brake for this movie.
Jessica: This ground has been mostly well-tred before but it looks like a decent adaptation and it’s Juice from Sons of Anarchy! Again, another one I might check out at home, if I came across it accidentally and went, “Oh yeah, i remember this from Trailer Snark”.

The Disappointments Room (Rogue Pictures) – Drama/Horror/Thriller
Rated R for violent content, bloody images, some sexuality and language
Tag Line: Some mysteries should not be unlocked.
Starring: Kate Beckinsale, Lucas Till
Plot: A mother and her young son release unimaginable horrors from the attic of their rural dream home.
Running Time: 92 minutes

Jessica: Anytime a trailer starts with someone saying “Its a new beginning”, you know bad things are about to go down. I got bored during the trailer, I’ll most likely skip this one. It doesn’t look engaging enough to even be a fun kind of scary movie. Just looks like stuff that’s been done before.
Ken: The real disappointments room will be theater screening this movie. Maybe the trailer just wasn’t very effective but it didn’t evoke even the slightest feeling of dread.
Chris: Just what the scary doctor ordered!

The Wild Life (Lionsgate) – Family/Animation
Rated PG for mild action/peril and some rude humor
Tag Line: Adventure’s in full swing.
Starring: Matthias Schweighofer, Kaya Yanar
Plot: A daring parrot recounts how Robinson Crusoe came to be stranded on a tropical island.
Running Time: 90 minutes

Chris: Mildly amusing and may be a nice one to watch at home with my animation loving wife.
Jessica: This did nothing for me whatsoever.
Ken: This has direct to DVD written all over it. If that’s Robinson Crusoe then the ship that wrecked was a slaver ship on a mission to haul slaves across the Atlantic from Africa. Sort of makes it hard to sympathize for the guy.

Other People (Vertical Entertainment) – Drama
Not Rated
Tag Line:  None
Starring:  Molly Shannon, Bradley Whitford
Plot: A struggling comedy writer, fresh off a breakup and in the midst of the worst year of his life, returns to Sacramento to care for his dying mother.
Running Time: 97 minutes

Ken: This looks funny and touching, and Molly Shannon surprised the heck out of me with her dramatic acting chops. That said, this feels like well worn territory but could be worth a rental.
Chris: It’s probably a fantastic Lifetime movie.
Jessica: I have to say, Molly Shannon surprises me here and Jesse Plemons was fantastic on “Friday Night Lights”. I’d watch this, not in the theater, but I’d totally watch this at home and probably laugh/cry.

Kicks (Focus World) – Adventure
Rated R for violence, drug/alcohol use and language throughout, and sexual content – involving teens
Tag Line: They aren’t just shoes.
Starring: Jahking Guillory, Christopher Jordan Wallace
Plot: Brandon is a 15 year old whose dream is a pair of fresh Air Jordans. Soon after he gets his hands on them, they’re stolen by a local hood, causing Brandon and his two friends go on a dangerous mission through Oakland to retrieve them.
Running Time: 80 minutes

Jessica: All I could think of was that movie that I can’t think of the title of that has Jake Gyllenhaal and that dang rabbit, this kid has an astronaut. Interesting looking film, but not interesting enough for me to shell out my hard-earned dollars at the theater.
Ken: Makes me glad I grew up in white-bred suburbia. This looks like a damn fine movie about coming of age in a black urban community in the vein of Boys in the Hood.
Chris: My kids would love this movie…me, not so much.

Come What May (Cohen Media Group) – Drama/War
Rated R for some war violence/bloody images
Tag Line: France, May 1940. Millions abandon all they have. One father searches for all that matters.
Starring: Olivier Gourmet, August Deihl
Plot: In may 1940, the German troops enter France. Frightened by the progress of the enemy, the people of a small village of Pas-de-Calais decide on the recommendations of the prefecture, to give up everything to go on the road, fleeing to the coast.
Running Time: 114 minutes

Chris: I am a sucker for WWII movies, so count me in.  I like that the Germans actually deliver their lines in German.
Jessica: I usually love WWII movies as well, but this one kind of left me a bit blah. Could be a great film, but the trailer was lackluster.
Ken: Yuck, subtitles. I usually watch movies when I’m feeling too lazy to read.

Demon (The Orchard) -Comedy/Horror/Thriller
Rated R for language and some sexuality/nudity
Tag Line: None
Starring: Itay Tiran, Agnieszka Zulewska
Plot: A bridegroom is possessed by an unquiet spirit in the midst of his own wedding celebration, in this clever take on the Jewish legend of the dybbuk.
Running Time: 94 minutes

Ken: As if it didn’t look creepy enough, the movie’s director hung himself after he completed this film.
Chris: The trailer is sufficiently creepy but The Disappointments Room is all that plus Kate Benckinsale.  Sorry Demon…but you lose.
Jessica: Now this looks intriguing! If I had to choose between the Disappointments movie and this one, I’d hands down go with this one. Using an old world legend in a new world? I’m SOLD. Looks creepy and artsy and as if it’ll make you jump a bit.

Tickets Purchased: One for Demon (Ken), One for Other People (Jessica) and One for The Disappointments Room (Chris)

Molly Shannon cuts a PSA to remind people to use the bathroom before grabbing your theater seat so you don't miss her dramatic turn in Other People!
Molly Shannon cuts a PSA to remind people to use the bathroom before grabbing your theater seat so you don’t miss her dramatic turn in Other People!
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Trailer Snark (May 13th, 2016 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Last Week: Captain America:  Civil War ruled all with a whopping $181.7M in receipts.  Jungle Book was a very distant second at $21.8 bringing its total to $284.9M domestic.  Third place Mother’s Day did not crack double digits at $9M and $20.7M overall.  Botttom line is a Disney Box Office wipeout.  The rest of the top ten shook out like this:  Huntsman:  Winter’s War ($3.5M/$40.3M), Keanu ($3M/$15.1M), Barbershop ($2.7M/$48.7M), Zootopia ($2.6M/$327.6M), The Boss ($$1.7M/$59.1M), and Batman vs Superman ($1M/$327.2M).  Now, on to this week’s new releases, sure to be crushed by Civil War.

Money Monster (Sony) – Drama
Rated R for language throughout, some sexuality and brief violence
Tag Line: #FollowTheMoney
Starring: George Clooney, Julia Roberts
Plot: Financial TV host Lee Gates and his producer Patty are put in an extreme situation when an irate investor takes over their studio.
Running Time: 98 minutes

Jessica: Snooze fest.
Jim: Love these Dog Day Afternoon set-ups. A strong cast helps.
Chris:  Some days I’d like to punch George Clooney in his perfect teeth.

The Darkness (High Top) – Horror/Thriller
Rated PG-13 for thematic elements, some disturbing violence, brief sensuality and language
Tag Line: Evil comes home.
Starring:  Kevin Bacon, Jennifer Morrison
Plot:  A family returns from a Grand Canyon vacation, haunted by an ancient supernatural entity they unknowingly awakened and engages them in a fight for their survival.
Running Time: 92 minutes

Chris:  Kevin Bacon and Jennifer Morrison last starred together in Stir of Echoes….good flick.  Not sure if I feel the stir with this trailer, however.
Jessica: Great choice to put it out on Friday the 13th and I love Kevin Bacon. The kid makes me nuts on “Gotham” but this could be a good home viewer.
Jim: Despite the presence of the great Kevin Bacon, looks like a by-the numbers modern horror movie.

Love and Friendship (Roadside Attractions) – Drama/Romance
Rated PG for some thematic elements
Tag Line: A lady never reveals her tactics.
Starring: Kate Beckinsale, Chloe Sevigny
Plot: Lady Susan Vernon takes up temporary residence at her in-laws’ estate and, while there, is determined to be a matchmaker for her daughter Frederica — and herself too, naturally.
Running Time: 92 minutes

Jim: Costume pictures are always a risk. They can be great (Dangerous Liasons), but most of the time it always looks too much like what it is—modern-day actors playing dress-up.
Chris: My mom would love this…yes, that was a back-handed compliment. 😉
Jessica: I got bored during the trailer. Skip!

The Lobster (A24) – Comedy/Drama/Romance
Rated R for sexual content including dialogue, and some violence
Tag Line: An unconventional love story by Yorgos Lanthimos.
Starring:  Colin Farrell, Rachel Weisz
Plot: In a dystopian near future, single people, according to the laws of The City, are taken to The Hotel, where they are obliged to find a romantic partner in forty-five days or are transformed into beasts and sent off into The Woods.
Running Time: 118 minutes

Jessica: I love quirky films and this looks just on the right side of quirky.
Jim: Looks bizarre enough to be interesting.
Chris:  Man, Collin packed on some weight for this lobster roll!

High Rise (Magnolia Pictures) – Drama
Rated R for violence, disturbing images, strong sexual content/graphic nudity, language and some drug use
Tag Line: Leave the real world behind.
Starring:  Tom Hiddleston, Jeremy Irons, Sienna Miller
Plot: Life for the residents of a tower block begins to run out of control.
Running Time:  119 minutes

Chris:  Looks like Snowpiercer in an apartment building.  Meh.
Jessica: Another one that intrigues me and I do so love Loki! I would watch this at home.
Jim: It must be Brit Week here on Trailer Snark—another strange, interesting- looking movie.

Last Days in the Desert (Broad Green Pictures) – Adventure/History/Drama
Rated PG-13 for some disturbing images and brief partial nudity
Tag Line: None
Starring:  Ewan MacGregor, Ciaran Hinds
Plot: An imagined chapter from Jesus’ forty days of fasting and praying in the desert. On his way out of the wilderness, Jesus struggles with the Devil over the fate of a family in crisis.
Running Time: 98 minutes

Jim: Sorry, No.
Chris: I love Ewan MacGregor and this one looks interesting to me.  Small screen viewing for sure.
Jessica: Not my cup of tea.

Search Party (Focus World) – Comedy
Rated R for language throughout, drug use, graphic nudity, and sexual content
Tag Line: This is not a vacation.  It’s a rescue mission.
Starring:  Adam Pally, T.J. Miller, Alison Brie
Plot: A pair of friends embark on a mission to reunite their pal with the woman he was going to marry.
Running Time: 93 minutes

Jessica: A poor mans Hangover. No thanks.
Jim: Scraping the last dregs of The Hangover. The vomiting donkey doesn’t help.
Chris: From the “I didn’t need to see that” files comes donkey puke!  The trailer was enough for me.  Pass.

Tickets Purchased:  Two for a re-visit with Civil War (Jessica and Chris) and one for Money Monster (Jim)

Box Office Champ?  Civil War's second week will be very telling!
Box Office Champ? Civil War’s second week will be very telling!