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Trailer Snark (February 24, 2017 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Get Out (Universal) – Horror/Mystery
Rated R for violence, bloody images, and language including sexual references
Tag Line: None
Starring: Daniel Kaluuya, Allison Williams
Plot: A young African-American man visits his Caucasian girlfriend’s mysterious family estate.
Running time: 103 minutes

Jim: How I have come to hate horror movie trailers (as much as I love good horror movies). They’re boring, cliched, and so “Oooh, look what we’re gonna scare you with now! Isn’t this scary??” That said, the plot of this had me intrigued. A creepy movie might be lurking under this ho-hum trailer.
Chris:  I was honestly waiting for the punchline to reveal this to be some kind of spoof movie.  Pretty underwhelming.

Collide (Open Road Films) –  Action/Thriller
Rated PG-13 for violence, frenetic action, some sexuality, language, and drug material
Tag Line: How far would you go for love?
Starring: Nicholas Hoult, Felicity Jones, Anthony Hopkins, Ben Kingsley
Plot: An American backpacker gets involved with a ring of drug smugglers as their driver, though he winds up on the run from his employers across Cologne high-speed Autobahn.
Running Time: 99 minutes

Chris: I think Anthony Hopkins and Ben Kingsley lost a bet to Nicholas Cage and Bruce Willis to star in this movie.
Jim: <Yawn> Looks like The Firm with cars.

Rock Dog (Summit Entertainment) – Animated/Family
Rated PG for action and language
Tag Line: A new breed of rock star.
Starring: Luke Wilson, Eddie Izzard
Plot: When a radio falls from the sky into the hands of a wide-eyed Tibetan Mastiff, he leaves home to fulfill his dream of becoming a musician, setting into motion a series of completely unexpected events.
Running Time: 80 minutes

Jim: Has kind of a secondhand look to it. Second-tier animation with been-there done-that gags. Pass.
Chris:  Does this dog know how to rock and roll over?  Was that a weak pun?  Yeah.  About as weak as that trailer.

Bitter Harvest (Roadside Attractions) – Drama/Romance/War
Rated R for violence and disturbing images
Tag Line: Soviet Union. 1933. Stalin’s tyranny could destroy their country. But not their love.
Starring: Max Irons, Samantha Barks, Barry Pepper
Plot: Set in 1930s Ukraine, as Stalin advances the ambitions of communists in the Kremlin, young artist Yuri battles to save his lover Natalka from the Holodomor, the death-by-starvation program that ultimately killed millions of Ukrainians.
Running Time: 103 minutes

Chris:  A pre-WWII era of history that has not received enough attention in film.  Historical set pieces are a favorite of mine.  Looks solid!
Jim: Reeks of a movie that’s “good for you.”

As You Are (Votiv Films) – Drama/Mystery
Not Rated
Tag Line: None
Starring: Owen Campbell, Charlie Heaton, Amanda Stenberg
Plot: Set in the early 1990’s, “As You Are” is the telling and retelling of a relationship between three teenagers as it traces the course of their friendship through a construction of disparate memories prompted by a police investigation.
Running Time: 110 minutes

Jim: Now THIS is the way to make a trailer. Hope the movie is as good.
Chris: Definitely made me want to see what the heck happened to the characters in the story.  I agree with Jim that this is the way you cut a trailer and get some attention.  Cheers!

Punching Henry (Well Go USA) – Comedy
Not Rated
Tag Line: None
Starring: Henry Phillips, J.K. Simmons, Sarah Silverman, Tig Notaro
Plot: Hapless satirical songwriter Henry Phillips is lured to LA when a veteran TV producer decides to make a show about the life of a loser.
Running Time: 95 minutes

Chris: This looks like a whole lot of I don’t give a crap.
Jim: What is it about this trailer? Didn’t it seem like it was bored with itself? If it weren’t for JK Simmons, I think I would have nodded off halfway through.

Tickets Purchased:  One for As You Are (Jim) and one for Bitter Harvest (Chris)

Get Out would probably be more successful if the Wayans Brothers wrote it.
Get Out would probably be more successful if the Wayans Brothers wrote it.