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Trailer Snark (August 4, 2017 Theatrical Releases)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Eric from View from Above, Robert from Cards and Counters, Wayne from The Dope Sheet, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

The Dark Tower (Columbia Pictures) – Action/Adventure/Fantasy
Rated PG-13 for thematic material including sequences of gun violence and action.
Tag Line: There are other worlds than these.
Starring: Idris Elba, Matthew McCaunaughey, Katheryn Winnick
Plot: The last Gunslinger, Roland Deschain, has been locked in an eternal battle with Walter O’Dim, also known as the Man in Black, determined to prevent him from toppling the Dark Tower, which holds the universe together. With the fate of the worlds at stake, good and evil will collide in the ultimate battle as only Roland can defend the Tower from the Man in Black.
Running Time: 95 minutes

Chris: Being a King fan, I feel a bit sheepish in saying that the epic work of his literary career is among my least favorite of his creative endeavors. That said, Idris Elba and Matthew McConaughey are awesome which make this one worth checking out.
Jim: I’m a King fan, but for some reason I’ve never had any interest in reading the Dark Tower books. Despite the great cast, this looks like a pretty blah and routine actioner/thriller/whatever.

Detroit (Annapurna Distribution) – Drama/Crime/History
Rated R for strong violence and pervasive language
Tag Line: It’s time we knew.
Starring: John Boyega, Anthony Mackie, Algee Smith
Plot: Amidst the chaos of the Detroit Rebellion, with the city under curfew and as the Michigan National Guard patrolled the streets, three young African American men were murdered at the Algiers Motel.
Running Time: 143 minutes

Jim: Looks like another winner from the red-hot Kathryn Bigelow. A great example of how a trailer can effectively sell a movie.
Chris: Intensity! Based on a true story, and definitely makes me want to know more. I’ll be checking it out.

Check out The Dope Sheet Movie review here!

Wind River (The Weinstein Company) – Action/Crime/Mystery
Rated R for strong violence, a rape, disturbing images, and language
Tag line: Nothing is harder to track than the truth.
Starring: Jeremy Renner, Elizabeth Olsen, Kelsey Asbille
Plot: An FBI agent teams with a town’s veteran game tracker to investigate a murder that occurred on a Native American reservation.
Running Time: 107 minutes

Chris: Two Avengers reunited. Love the setting for this murder mystery, with the feeling of isolation leading to greater danger. I am in.
Jim: A pretty lackluster trailer (and come on, not even touting the names of the actors—they’re two of the Avengers, man!) Pass.

Tickets Purchased:  One for The Dark Tower (Chris) and one for Detroit (Jim)

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Trailer Snark (January 27, 2017 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Editorial Disclaimer from Chris:  In last week’s Trailer Snark, I slagged XXX: Return of Xander Cage pretty hard and basically promised to not see it.  Sadly, I could not keep my promise as my son’s birthday request was to go see said movie.  Fate is such a cruel mistress.  After watching it, I still stand by everything I said before.  It was awful!

Resident Evil: The Final Chapter (Screen Gems) – Action/Horror/Sci-Fi
Rated R for sequences of violence throughout
Tag Line: The journey ends.
Starring:  Milla Jovovich, Ali Larter, Ruby Rose
Plot: Picking up immediately after the events in Resident Evil: Retribution, Alice is the only survivor of what was meant to be humanity’s final stand against the undead. Now, she must return to where the nightmare began – The Hive in Raccoon City, where the Umbrella Corporation is gathering its forces for a final strike against the only remaining survivors of the apocalypse.
Running Time: 106 minutes

Jim: Two questions—Why do trailers like these seem as long as the movie itself? And does Milla Jovovich ever age?
Jessica: I’m so over these movies. I’ll pass.
Chris: This series has been truly uneven in result, but I can’t help but be pulled in to what promises to be the closure of this long-running genre series.  Milla has proven herself to be a worthy action star with her intensity and appeal. 

A Dog’s Purpose (Universal) – Adventure/Comedy/Drama
Rated PG for thematic elements and some peril
Tag Line: Every dog happens for a reason.
Starring: Josh Gad, Dennis Quaid
Plot: A dog looks to discover his purpose in life over the course of several lifetimes and owners.
Running Time: 120 minutes

Chris: Certainly looks better than Kevin Spacey’s turn as a cat, but not my kind of big screen viewing. Who would have thought such a cute movie would come with such controversy aside?
Jim: Awwwww! How can you NOT be into this trailer?! I’ll even forgive it for playing Peter Gabriel’s Solsbury Hill, surely the most overused trailer song of all time.
Jessica: No way, the videos and investigation of animal abuse on the st of this film has turned me off from a movie that already looked pretty trite to me anyway. I love animals and cannot support anything that might be suspected of abusing them.

Gold (Dimension) – Adventure/Drama/Thriller
Rated R for language throughout and some sexuality/nudity
Tag Line: It was never about the money.
Starring: Matthew McConaughey, Edgar Ramirez, Bruce Dallas Howard, Cory Stoll
Plot: Kenny Wells, a prospector desperate for a lucky break, teams up with a similarly eager geologist and sets off on a journey to find gold in the uncharted jungle of Indonesia.
Running Time: 121 minutes
Jessica: I have adored Matthew since Dazed and Confused so I watch his movies whenever I can. He’s only gotten better with age. This one looks fantastic.
Chris: The only thing missing was an inner monologue from McConaughey.  Looks excellent!
Jim: It’s got Matthew M, so it must be worth seeing, at  least at home.

Tickets Purchased:  2 for Gold (Jim and Jessica) and 1 for Resident Evil (Chris)

mccon

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Trailer Snark (December 30, 2016 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

The Trailer Snark team is taking a break for Christmas, so this week’s edition will be without commentary.  Happy Holidays!

Live By Night (Warner Bros) – Crime/Drama
Rated R for strong violence, language throughout, and some sexuality/nudity
Tag Line: The American Dream has a price.
Starring: Ben Affleck, Elle Fanning, Brendan Gleason
Plot: A story set in the Prohibition Era and centered around a group of individuals and their dealings in the world of organized crime.
Running Time:  128 minutes

Hidden Figures (20th Century Fox) – Drama
Rated PG for thematic elements and some language
Tag Line: Based on the untold true story.
Starring: Taraji Henson, Octavia Spencer
Plot: Based on a true story! A team of African-American women provide NASA with important mathematical data needed to launch the program’s first successful space missions.
Running Time: 127 minutes

Gold (TWC-Dimension) – Crime/Drama/Thriller
Rated R for language throughout and some sexuality/nudity
Tag Line:  Prove ’em all wrong.
Starring: Matthew McConaughey, Bryce Dallas Howard
Plot: An unlikely pair venture to the Indonesian jungle in search of gold.
Running Time: 121 minutes

20th Century Women (A24) – Comedy/Drama
Rated R for sexual material, language, some nudity and brief drug use
Tag Line: None
Starring: Annette Benning, Elle Fanning, Greta Gerwig
Plot: The story of three women who explore love and freedom in Southern California during the late 1970s.
Running Time: 118 minutes

Paterson (Bleecker Street Media) – Comedy/Drama
Rated R for some language
Tag Line: If you ever left me I’d tear my heart out and never put it back
Starring: Adam Driver, Nellie, Goldshifteh Farahani
Plot: A quiet observation of the triumphs and defeats of daily life, along with the poetry evident in its smallest details. Running Time: 118 minutes

Live

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Trailer Snark (June 24, 2016 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Last Week: Was there ever any doubt?  Finding Dory topped the box office with $136.1M.  Central Intelligence managed a solid second place debut with $34.5M.  The Conjuring 2 slipped to third place with $15.5M to add to its $71.7M domestic total.  The rest of the list did not manage double digits and came in this order:  Now You See Me 2 ($9.6M/$41.3M), Warcraft ($6.5M/$37.7M), X-Men: Apocalypse ($5.2M/$143M), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles:  Out of the Shadows ($5.2M/$71.9M), Me Before You ($4.1M/$46.3M), Alice Through the Looking Glass ($3.6M/$69.3M), and Captain America: Civil War ($2.2M/$401.2M).  This week’s contenders are…..

Independence Day: Resurgence (Twentieth Century Fox) – Action/Sci-Fi
Rated PG – 13 for sequences of sci – fi action and destruction, and for some language
Tag Line: We had twenty years to prepare. So did they.
Starring: Liam Hemsworth, Jeff Goldblum, Bill Pullman
Plot: Two decades after the first Independence Day invasion, Earth is faced with a new extra-Solar threat. But will mankind’s new space defenses be enough?
Running Time: 120 minutes

Chris: I was one of the few people I know that did not enjoy it the first time around.  I guarantee you I will not be rushing out to see the sequel.
Jessica: YESSSSS!!! I ADORE the first movie for it’s goofy America-ness so I am soo there for this one. It looks equally as fun and has a Hemsworth in it to boot (any Hemsworth will do really).
Jim: 20 years ago, a big-budget alien invasion movie was still something of a novelty. Now they’re a dime a dozen. I’m not sure how many people are interested in this, could be this year’s Terminator: Genisys.  That  said, the trailer’s well done, evoking the enjoyably corny too-muchness of  the original.
Ken: That looked sweet, guess I should get around to watching the first movie at some point. Earth should build a wall around the planet to keep the alien invaders out. And have the aliens pay for it.

The Shallows (Columbia) – Drama/Horror
Rated PG – 13 for bloody images, intense sequences of peril, and brief strong language
Tag Line: Plan your getaway.
Starring:  Blake Lively, Oscar Jaenada
Plot: A mere 200 yards from shore, surfer Nancy is attacked by a great white shark, with her short journey to safety becoming the ultimate contest of wills.
Running Time: 87 minutes

Jessica: Good timing with Shark Week starting on Saturday, it shows A LOT in the trailer so that concerns me, I’d watch this at home though because I do enjoy a good shark flick and this has potential to be good.
Jim: The Shallows—Jaws and Open Water did it for me. What more can anyone really add to another shark attack movie without it appearing drawn out and/or ridiculous?
Ken: She’s gonna need a bigger surfboard. Probably pass on this one, but that is one cool looking shark.
Chris: I hate that they show you so much in the trailer, but it sure freaks me out something fierce.  I am ready to squirm in my seat!

Free State of Jones (STX Entertainment) – Biography/Drama
Rated R for brutal battle scenes and disturbing graphic images
Tag Line: Based on the incredible true story.
Starring: Matthew McCounaghey, Gugu Mbatha-Raw, Keri Russell
Plot: As civil war divides the nation, a poor farmer from Mississippi leads a group of rebels against the Confederate army.
Running Time: 139 minutes

Jim: Civil War movies have always held an appeal for me. That and Matthew McConaughey—I’m in.
Ken: Love me some Civil War. The McConaughey revival marches on.
Chris: Looks like a solid civil war era military drama…..my cup of tea.
Jessica: I do enjoy Matthew and this looks like a solid pick, but I’d watch it at home, not the theater.

The Neon Demon (Broad Green Pictures) – Drama/Horror
Rated R for disturbing violent content, bloody images, graphic nudity, a scene of aberrant sexuality, and language
Tag Line: Beauty isn’t everything it’s the only thing.
Starring:  Elle Fanning, Christina Hendricks, Keanu Reeves
Plot: When aspiring model Jesse moves to Los Angeles, her youth and vitality are devoured by a group of beauty-obsessed women who will take any means necessary to get what she has.
Running Time: 117 minutes

Ken: I don’t know what I just watched, but I didn’t like it.
Chris: Psycho model Elle Fanning.  I remember when she was such a sweet girl.  Pass.
Jessica: Looks interesting but I really didn’t like “Drive” all that much and a movie about unhappy models…Meh.
Jim: Trying too hard to impress me with its weirdness.

Weiner Dog (IFC Films) – Comedy
Rated R for language and some disturbing content.
Tag Line: None
Starring: Danny Devito, Ellen Burnstyn
Plot: A dachshund passes from oddball owner to oddball owner, whose radically dysfunctional lives are all impacted by the pooch.
Running Time: 90 minutes

Chris: Was that supposed to be funny?
Jessica: This one charmed me I have to say. I’d watch it at home for sure.
Jim: Couldn’t be less interested.
Ken: I found this oddly charming, but not enough to make a trip out of it. Renter maybe.

Hunt for the Wilderpeople (The Orchard) – Adventure/Comedy
Rated PG-13 for thematic elements including violent content, and for some language
Tag Line: None
Starring:  Sam Neill, Julian Denson
Plot: A national manhunt is ordered for a rebellious kid and his foster uncle who go missing in the wild New Zealand bush.
Running Time: 101 minutes

Jessica: I am already in love with this movie. Great casting, I loved “What We Do In The Shadows” so I have a feeling the humor will be spot-on and creative.
Jim: Looks funny and enjoyable.  Sam Neill is always a plus.
Ken: The dialogue had me in stitches.  I’ll definitely be streaming this down the line.
Chris:  Now, THAT looks funny.

Tickets Purchased: Two for Independence Day (Jessica and Ken), One for Hunt for the Wilderpeople (Jim), and One for The Shallows (Chris).

Keanu's movie didn't get picked by anyone this week, but he is so captionable!
Keanu’s movie didn’t get picked by anyone this week, but he is so captionable!