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Trailer Snark (June 21, 2017 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Eric from View from Above, Robert from Cards and Counters, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Transformers: The Last Knight (Paramount) – Action/Sci-Fi
Rated PG-13 for violence and intense sequences of sci-fi action, language, and some innuendo
Tag Line: For one world to live, the other must die.
Starring:  Mark Wahlberg, Anthony Hopkins
Plot: Humans and Transformers are at war, Optimus Prime is gone. The key to saving our future lies buried in the secrets of the past, in the hidden history of Transformers on Earth.
Running Time: 149 minutes

Chris: The news of plans for 14 more films had a suddenly wearying effect on me.  Yeah, you read that right.
Jim: I was born about 10 years too early to get excited about the mention of the word Transformers. I’ve only seen the first movie in this franchise and thought it was Ok as time-wasting popcorn flicks go. The trailers for the rest of them have just looked boring in that we’re-gonna-shove-CGI-down-your-throat-until-you-beg-for-mercy way. Including this one.
Wayne: I’ve given up on the trailers because they are always better than the movies.  With that said, I saw it last (k)night.

You can read Wayne’s review of the movie at The Dope Sheet right here!

The Big Sick (Lionsgate) – Comedy/Romance
Rated R for language including some sexual references
Tag Line: An awkward love story.
Starring: Kumail Nanjiani, Zoe Kazan, Ray Romano
Plot: A couple deals with their cultural differences as their relationship grows.
Running Time: 119 minutes

Wayne: Interesting movie, surely going to be a tear jerker.  Going to sell this one and wait for Netflix.
Chris: Nice to see Ray Romano in a feature film that isn’t animated, but I found the laughs hard to come by in this trailer.  Pass.
Jim: This looks like it could be a great romcom. Hope all of the good moments aren’t in the trailer.

The Beguiled (Focus Features) – Drama
Rated R for some sexuality
Tag Line: None
Starring: Nicole Kidman, Kirsten Dunst, Elle Fanning, Colin Farrell
Plot: At a girls’ school in Virginia during the Civil War, where the young women have been sheltered from the outside world, a wounded Union soldier is taken in. Soon, the house is taken over with sexual tension, rivalries, and an unexpected turn of events.
Running Time: 93 minutes

Jim: Interesting-looking remake of the ’71 Clint Eastwood classic. The cast certainly helps.
Wayne: Going to sell this trailer.  I don’t care for time period pieces like this and I also don’t find this cast ensemble appealing.   
Chris: Now we’re talking!  Kirsten Dunst and Nicole Kidman sharing the screen together is a treat.  Add in some Colin Farrel and a touch of revenge and you have yourself some pretty good cinematic potential!

The Bad Batch (Neon) – Romance/Sci-Fi
Rated R for violence, language, some drug content and brief nudity
Tag Line: None
Starring: Suki Waterhouse, Jason Momoa
Plot: A dystopian love story in a Texas wasteland and set in a community of cannibals.
Running Time: 118 minutes

Chris: What is this?  Some kind of Mad Max meets Hills Have Eyes meets Rob Zombie hybrid?  May be a rental, even if that, to be honest.  The Bad Batch is right.
Jim: Looks like a bad Tarantino knockoff minus the humor. Pass.
Wayne: Looks like a great cast, but has the feel of an 80’s film with no direction.  Going to sell this trailer.

Tickets Purchased: One for Transformers (Wayne), One for The Big Sick (Jim), and One for The Beguiled (Chris)

We just could not agree this week.
We just could not agree this week.
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Trailer Snark (June 3, 2016 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Last Week:  Another Marvel franchise tops the box office in its debut week as X-Men:  Apocalypse took in $65M.  Alice Through the Looking Glass debuted in second with $28.1M.  Last week’s winner, Angry Birds, slipped to third place with another $18.7M for a total domestic haul of $66.3M.  Civil War came in fourth with $15.1M and $372.6M overall.   Neighbors 2 rounded out the first five with $9.1M and $$38.3M overall.  The rest of the top ten was as follows:  Jungle book ($6.9M/$338.4M), The Nice Guys ($6.3M/$21.7M), Money Monster ($4.2M/$33.9M), Love and Friendship ($2.4M/$3.4M), and Zooptopia ($1M/$335.8).  Let’s check out this week’s new box office entries!

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows (Paramount) – Action/Adventure
Rated PG-13 for sci-fi action violence
Tag Line: Only one team can defend us all.
Starring: Megan Fox, Will Arnett, Tyler Perry
Plot: As Shredder joins forces with mad scientist Baxter Stockman and henchmen Bebop and Rocksteady to take over the world, the Turtles must confront an even greater nemesis: the notorious Krang.
Running Time: 112 minutes

Chris: A vigilante who uses a hockey stick as a weapon?  It’s about dang time!  I’ll take that with a side of pizza any day.
Jim: Between the onslaught in the early ’90s and the current rebirth—-enough awready!
Jessica: Please good Lord above, no more turtles! I barely made it through the 1st one, i cannot do it again.

Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping (Universal) – Comedy
Rated R for some graphic nudity, language throughout, sexual content and drug use
Tag Line: None
Starring:  Adam Samberg, Imogen Poots, Bill Hader
Plot: When it becomes clear that his solo album is a failure, a former boy band member does everything in his power to maintain his celebrity status.
Running Time: 86 minutes too long

Jessica: Eh. Could be funny, could be terrible. Either way, I am NOT going to the theater for it.
Chris: More like poopstar.
Jim: A few too many poop jokes.

Me Before You (MGM) – Drama/Romance
Rated PG-13 for thematic elements and some suggestive material
Tag Line: None
Starring:  Emilia Clarke, Sam Claflin
Plot: A girl in a small town forms an unlikely bond with a recently-paralyzed man she’s taking care of.
Running Time: 110 minutes

Jim: Looks good, I guess the book was a big deal.  They probably didn’t have to show the whole dang movie in the trailer, though. Rental.
Jessica: This looks good, but only the kind of good movie that I watch to get in a good cry, like “PS I Love You”.
Chris: I may catch this at home with the wife, but no way is this a theater viewer.

The Fits (Oscilloscope) – Drama
Not Rated
Tag Line: None
Starring:  Royalty Hightower, Alexis Neblett
Plot: While training at the gym 11-year-old tomboy Toni becomes entranced with a dance troupe. As she struggles to fit in she finds herself caught up in danger as the group begins to suffer from fainting spells and other violent fits.
Running Time: 72 minutes

Chris: Another one more “fit” for the small screen, especially at a 72 minute running time.  I hear that Royalty Hightower gives a heck of a performance in her breakout role.
Jim: Always good to see something other than the usual cookie cutter trailer. Nicely done.
Jessica: I want to say I’ll watch this at home because it does intrigue me, but I know I’ll forget all about it and never watch it. Looks like an interesting story and some great acting from Royalty Hightower (amazing name by the way).

Tickets Purchased:  One for The Fits (Jim) and One for the Turtles (Chris)

This rookie could have a bright future!
This rookie could have a bright future!
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Trailer Snark (January 15 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Last Week: All hail Star Wars!  The Force Awakens racked up another $41.6M in receipts bringing its total domestic haul to $812M.  Incredible.  The Revenant came in second in its first wide release week with $38M.  Daddy’s Home brought the laughs to the tune of $15M ($116M overall) for third place.  And The Forest debuted at number four with $13M.  The rest of the top ten played out like this:  Sisters ($7.1/$74.8M), The Hateful Eight ($6.3M/$41.4), The Big Short ($6.3M/$42.8M), Alvin and the Chipmunks ($5.5M/$75.6M), Joy ($4.5M/$46.5M), and Concussion ($3M/$$30.9M).  This week’s new box office contenders are…..

Ride Along 2 (Universal) – Comedy
Rated PG-13 for sequences of violence, sexual content, language and some drug material
Tag Line: The brother in-law are back.
Starring: Kevin Hart, Ice Cube, Olivia Munn, Benjamin Bratt
Plot: As his wedding day approaches, Ben heads to Miami with his soon-to-be brother-in-law James to bring down a drug dealer who’s supplying the dealers of Atlanta with product.
Running Time: 101 minutes

Chris: I still have not seen the first.  That said, it looks like a fun flick.
Ken: Ha, brothers in “law”. Anyone else see the irony in Ice Cube playing a police officer?
Jim: Haven’t seen the first one, but this looks funny. I’ll go along for the “Ride”…hee hee yuk yuk.
Rob: Um no.
Jessica: Ugh. P A S S.

13 Hours: The Secret Soldiers of Benghazi (Paramount) – Drama/Action
Rated R for strong combat violence throughout, bloody images, and language
Tag Line: In 2012, the threat level in Benghazi, Libya was deemed “critical”. When everything went wrong, six men had the courage to do what was right.
Starring: John Krasinski, James Badge Dale, Pablo Schreiber
Plot: An American Ambassador is killed during an attack at a U.S. compound in Libya as a security team struggles to make sense out of the chaos.
Running Time: 144 minutes

Jessica: When I saw Michael Bay’s name I gave up all hope of it being anywhere near realistic but hey, there will be great action and things will go boom.
Chris: My clear winner this week.  Gripping look at a tragedy the government does not want you to know too much about.
Ken: It’s a Michael Bay war adaptation, which is why most of the movie will focus on an incomprehensible love triangle and not the real story behind the 2012 attacks.
Jim: It looked like Zero Dark Thirty 2 until I saw Michael Bay’s name. This can’t possibly be good.
Rob: I’m curious to see how close this picture comes to painting the truth.  But is it too soon for a film on this somewhat recent event?

Norm of the North (Lionsgate) – Animation/Family
Rated PG for mild rude humor and action
Tag Line: Before he can save the Arctic… he’ll need a little help.
Starring: Rob Schneider, Heather Graham
Plot: Displaced from their Arctic home, a polar bear named Norm and his three lemming friends wind up in New York City, where Norm becomes the mascot of a corporation he soon learns is tied to the fate of his homeland.
Running Time: 86 minutes

Rob: Animation looks pretty good, but not really interested.  Will maybe catch it on Netflix down the road.
Jessica: No thank you! I like dancing animals but this did nothing for me.
Chris: Cookie cutter kid fare.  I am sure 3 out 4 kids will approve.
Ken: Unbearable.  Come on, you were all thinking it.
Jim: I was subjected to this trailer in a movie theater. Couldn’t do it again.

Band of Robbers (Gravitas Ventures) – Adventure/Crime
Not Rated
Tag Line: From Mark Twain’s iconic books.
Starring: Kyle Gallner, Adam Nee, Matthew Gray Gubler
Plot: Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn are grown men, still searching for the hidden treasure that has eluded them since childhood.
Running Time: 95 minutes
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sftM3Hx98f4
Ken: I like the idea of doing a modern retelling of Mark Twain, but the trailer didn’t do much for me. I might give it a watch when it comes out on demand.
Jim: As Ken said, a modern retelling of Twain would be nice, but the trailer was pretty bland and uninteresting. Oh well, I think we have our kind-of modern Twain retelling in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off—am I right? 🙂
Rob: Mildly interesting premise, but no thanks.
Jessica: I want to say I’ll watch this but that’s like saying I’ll one day tap dance for the Pope so yeah, nope.
Chris: I agree with Ken on this one.  The premise exceeds the delivery it would seem from the trailer.  Perhaps a pleasant small screen surprise?

The Benefactor (Samuel Goldwyn Films) – Drama
Not Rated
Tag Line: His helps comes at a price.
Starring: Richard Gere, Dakota Fanning
Plot: A philanthropist meddles in the lives of newly-married couples in an attempt to relive his past.
Running Time: 90 minutes

Jim: Looks interesting, possible rental.
Chris: Wow….it reminded me of Mr. Brooks with a more tragic beginning.  Unsettling.
Ken: Gere’s been taking on some very dark roles recently and it seems to be paying off. Not my type of movie but the trailer was plenty disturbing. Could be fun if you are into thrillers.
Rob: Gere and Fanning are talented, but this is a rental at best.
Jessica: Interesting but an at home viewer if ever.

Tickets Purchased: One for Ride Along 2 (Jim) and One for 13 Hours (Chris).  Ken and Rob go see Star Wars again to make sure it breaks all the records, and Jessica sits at home with a repeat viewing of The Martian.

Not really a Force Awakens spoiler.  Emails show who ordered the destruction of Alderaan.
Not really a Force Awakens spoiler. Emails show who ordered the destruction of Alderaan.