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Trailer Snark (February 10, 2017 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

The Lego Batman Movie (Warner Bros) – Animated/Family
Rated PG for rude humor and some action
Tag Line: Checkin’ out these sick beats
Starring: Will Arnett, Michael Cera, Rosario Dawson, Ralph Fiennes
Plot: Bruce Wayne must not only deal with the criminals of Gotham City, but also the responsibility of raising a boy he adopted.
Running Time: 104 minutes

Jessica:  I thought the Lego Movie was hilarious so I have hopes that this one will be too. The previews crack me up!
Chris: One superhero movie I won’t be seeing in the theater.  I’d rather walk barefoot on the whole cast.

Fifty Shades Darker (Universal) – Drama/Romance
Rated R for strong erotic sexual content, some graphic nudity, and language
Tag Line: Slip into something a shade darker
Starring:  Dakota Johnson, Jamie Dornan, Eric Johnson
Plot: While Christian wrestles with his inner demons, Anastasia must confront the anger and envy of the women who came before her.
Running Time: 118 minutes

Chris: Probably the only thing more torturous than walking barefoot across the lego movie cast would be watching this pile of garbage.
Jessica: I detested the first book, the movie was moderately better (which is NOT saying much) and I have ZERO interest in seeing this though I suspect Frankie will trick me into it at some point. We’ll never pay movie ticket prices for this load of blah.

John Wick: Chapter 2 (Lionsgate) –  Action/Crime/Thriller
Rated R for strong violence throughout, some language and brief nudity.
Tag Line: None
Starring: Keanu Reeves, Ruby Rose, Lawrence Fishburne
Plot: After returning to the criminal underworld to repay a debt, John Wick discovers that a large bounty has been put on his life.
Running Time: 122 minutes

Jessica: LOVED the first one! Can’t wait to catch the sequel!
Chris: I still have not seen the first movie, but this one looks like a fun night at the theater.  Perhaps a little double feature Blu-Ray showing of the original coupled with a big screen Keanu how do you do?

A United Kingdom (Fox Searchlight) – Biography/Drama/Romance
Rated PG-13 for some language including racial epithets and a scene of sensuality
Tag Line: None
Starring: David Oyelowo, Rosamund Pike
Plot: Prince Seretse Khama of Botswana causes an international stir when he marries a white woman from London in the late 1940s.
Running Time: 111 minutes

Chris: I have been watching The Crown on Netflix lately…similar type material, and I am a fan of Rosamund Pike.  More likely a small screen candidate though.
Jessica: Oh this is right up my alley. Love the cast and the message behind it is so very important. This looks fantastic.

Tickets purchased:  Two for John Wick: Chapter 2!

You killed his dog....prepare to die
You killed his dog….prepare to die
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Trailer Snark (August 14 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

Last Week: Marvel’s supremacy at the box office has proven to only reach so far, as the debuting Fantastic Four reboot only managed a runner-up finish with only $26 million in receipts.  One can only hope that this kind of box office disappointment opens the door to Disney reacquiring the film rights to the franchise from Fox, so Marvel’s first comic heroes can be brought into the story lines being woven throughout TV, Netflix, and cinema by the parent company.  So, who landed on top?  Look no further than last week’s box office champion, Mission Impossible: Rogue Nation whose $30 million dollar haul jettisoned the fifth in the franchise film over $100 million domestic.  Jason Bateman’s thriller The Gift captured third place with $12 million.  Vacation added $9 million for fourth ($37 million overall), Ant-Man stayed in the top five with another $8 million ($147 million overall), Minions in sixth breaking the $300 million mark with its $7 million weekend, and the only other top ten debut, Ricki and the Flash, earning $7 million in seventh.  Trainwreck, Pixels, and Southpaw rounded out the rest of the list.  And now onto this week’s contenders…..

The Man from U.N.C.L.E. (Warner Bros) – Action/Adventure/Comedy
Rated PG-13 for action violence, some suggestive content, and partial nudity
Tag Line: Saving the world never goes out of style.
Starring:  Henry Cavill, Armie Hammer, and Hugh Grant
Plot: In the early 1960s, CIA agent Napoleon Solo and KGB operative Illya Kuryakin participate in a joint mission against a mysterious criminal organization, which is working to proliferate nuclear weapons.
Running Time: 116 minutes

Rob: Looks fun.  Since the TV show in the 60’s predates my existence I dont know much about the show.  so perhaps I’ll check out the United Network Command for Law and Enforcement.
Ken: Guy Ritchie lost me after Snatch. A revamp of a TV show that aired decades ago back when we were still fighting the Rooskies. I wonder if the US / Soviet team-up angle loses some of its societal impact. How crazy would this movie have been if they cast an Afghani soldier?
Jessica: This looks like a lot of fun. I’ve never seen the original material but I like Cavill and Guy Ritchie.
Chris: I just saw Kingsman the other day, and it has set my mind afire for espionage spy fare, and this movie looks like it may fit that bill to a T.

Straight Outta Compton (Legendary) – Bio/Drama/Music
Rated R for language throughout, strong sexuality/nudity, violence, and drug use
Tag Line: The world’s most dangerous times created the world’s most dangerous group.
Starring: O’Shea Jackson Jr, Corey Hawkins, Jason Mitchell, and Paul Giamatti
Plot: The group NWA emerges from the streets of Compton, California in the mid-1980s and revolutionizes Hip Hop culture with their music and tales about life in the hood.
Running Time: 147 minutes

Chris: I can see the appeal for a film that details what may have been the most notorious gangsta rap act of their time, and I’d probably catch it on Netflix, but no way is this theater visit for me.
Rob: “Our art is a reflection of our reality”.  An interesting look at the story of NWA and a reality that sorely needs change even today.
Ken: Helllllll yeah…. West coast rap, specifically Dre’s masterpiece The Chronic, was the soundtrack to a large chunk of my teenage years. This movie looks great. I hope they don’t bail on the fallout between NWA.
Jessica: Not a big fan of NWA but these guys definitely have a story to tell, I would watch this in the comfort of my home.

Underdogs (Gkids) – Animation/Family
Rated PG for mild thematic elements
Tag Line:  N/A
Starring: The vocal talents of Michael Broadbridge and Juan Jose Campanella
Plot: A young man named Amadeo sets off on an unexpected adventure with the players of his beloved Foosball game.
Running Time: 106 minutes

Jessica: No. Just. NO.
Chris: Welcome to the Children’s Bargain Bin!
Rob: Animated flick about fusbol players coming to life and a geeky fusbol champ standing up to a bully on a real soccer field.  Is it me or are the lips all out of synch?
Ken: Foosball is more fun than pool or air hockey but not nearly fun enough to make me watch a feature film about soccer that doesn’t involve Shaolin monks. I’m guessing this is a foreign import, it has European funk all over it.  I’m sure the animators will have the mouth flaps synced up for the US release.

Mistress America (Fox Searchlight) – Comedy
Rated R for language including some sexual references
Tag Line: N/A
Starring: Greta Gerwig and Lola Kirk
Plot: A lonely college freshman’s life is turned upside down by her impetuous, adventurous soon-to-be stepsister.
Running Time: 84 minutes

Ken: Looks extremely cute and charming but only mildly funny.
Jessica: Again no. No. No.
Chris: You couldn’t find the funny with Fox’s searchlight….see what I did there?
Rob: A comedy in which the trailer didn’t even make me crack a smile.  Probably not the best omen…

People Places Things (The Film Arcade) – Comedy
Rated R for language including some sexual references, and brief nudity
Tag Line: His next chapter is up in the air.
Starring: Jemaine Clement, Regina Hall
Plot: Will Henry is a newly single graphic novelist balancing parenting his young twin daughters and a classroom full of students while exploring and navigating the rich complexities of new love and letting go of the woman who left him.
Running Time: 85 minutes

Rob: This one’s a rental.  Seems to have character and soul, just not of big screen caliber.
Ken: Rats, I was hoping for a song. It will be interesting to see Jermaine’s serious side, which looks surprisingly genuine.
Jessica: I adore Clement since “Flight of the Concords” and he had me at “Im a sassy little hobbit.”
Chris: I wasn’t expecting much from the description, but looks like a real winner.

Return to Sender (Image Entertainment) – Thriller
Rated R for brutal graphic violence and profanity
Tag Line: N/A
Starring: Rosamund Pike, Shiloh Fernandez, and Nick Nolte
Plot: A nurse living in small town goes on a blind date with a man who is not the person he says he is.
Running Time: 95 minutes

Chris: This one looks like a tough one to watch, content-wise.  In a summer state of mind, and not really up for something so dark in a real world way.  Rosamund Pike is a favorite of mine though.
Rob: Weird freaky rape movie.  No thanks.
Ken: After watching that trailer I need a long, hot shower, a brain enema and my faith in humanity restored.
Jessica: I have to say that at first I didn’t really think much of this but Pike was fantastic in “Gone Girl” and this looks interesting. I’d definitely check it out.

Fort Tilden (Orion) – Comedy
Rated R for language, sexual content, some graphic nudity and brief drug use
Tag Line: N/A
Starring: Bridey Elliot and Clare McNulty
Plot: A comedy about Allie and Harper and their needlessly difficult journey to the beach.
Running Time: 98 minutes

Jessica: Looks like it could be really funny and quirky or really stupid.
Chris: Strikes me as the female version of Dude, Where’s My Car.  Might be an entertaining rental.
Rob: Not my cup of tea.  Not sure it is anyone’s cup of tea actually…
Ken: A bromance for women, a womance? Ok I’ll admit it, I thought that looked damn entertaining.

Final Girl (Cinedigm) – Action/Drama/Thriller
Rated R for disturbing violent content, and some language
Tag Line: The hunted becomes the hunter.
Starring: Abigail Breslin, Wes Bentley, Logan Huffman, and Cameron Bright
Plot: A man teaches a young woman how to become a complete weapon. 13 years later, at 18 she will approach a group of sadistic teens who killed blonde women for unknown reasons. The hunting season begins.
Running Time: 90 minutes

Ken: The trailer was terrible, but I think it was because of the way it was edited together. The movie itself looked terrible as well. No excuses there. That looked awful.
Jessica: Totally in. I like the twist. At first I was prepared to give it a big ole no but I like the idea of Breslin being a bad-ass so I’d check this out.
Chris: It started off like a group American Psychopath rip-off, and then took a quite different turn.  Count me in!
Rob: Horror movie in which a group of four scumbags hunt girls and kill them until someone is trained to take them down.  Yep,  they’re defeated by Kit Kitteredge.  No thanks.

Tickets Purchased:  2 for Straight Outta Compton (Rob and Ken), 1 for The Man from U.N.C.L.E. (Chris) and Jessica stays home with a good book.

Who else is kickin' it old school this weekend?
Who else is kickin’ it old school this weekend?

 

What will you be seeing in theaters this weekend?
-The Great Stories Team