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Trailer Snark (January 6, 2017 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

And now to kick off 2017!

Underworld: Blood Wars (Screen Gems) – Action/Horror
Rated R for strong bloody violence, and some sexuality
Tag Line: Protect the bloodline.
Starring: Kate Beckinsale, Theo James
Plot: Vampire death dealer, Selene (Kate Beckinsale) fights to end the eternal war between the Lycan clan and the Vampire faction that betrayed her.
Running Time: 91 minutes

Jessica: I think they need to stop with these movies. The first one was great, but they kind of lost me after. I think I was bored with the endless gun battles. They’re vampires and werewolves, they should have freakin MYSTICAL powers, why do they need so many guns!!!!!????
Jim: I was so bored by this trailer I could barely remember it 10 seconds after I watched it.
Chris: I liked the original, but the sequels have left me cold.  And I can’t help but think of Milla Jovovich from Resident Evil when I see Kate Beckinsale do her butt kicking in leather bit.  Wait for the small screen!

A Monster Calls (Focus Features) – Drama/Fantasy
Rated PG-13 for thematic content and some scary images
Tag Line: Stories are wild creatures.
Starring: Sigourney Weaver, Felicity Jones, Lewis MacDougall
Plot: A boy seeks the help of a tree monster to cope with his single mom’s terminal illness.
Running Time: 108 minutes
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UvZrnt9b7vU
Chris: It’s about time that Liam Neeson does the taking.  This flick seems to be a nice escape from the post-Christmas winter blues.
Jessica: This really looks fantastic. I was intrigued, I admit it. Totally something I’d watch.
Jim: This looks like a winner for sure, captivating and magical.

I, Daniel Blake (Sundance Selects) – Drama
Rated R for language
Tag Line: None
Starring: Dave Johns, Hayley Squires
Plot: A middle aged carpenter who requires state welfare after injuring himself, is joined by a single mother in a similar scenario.
Running Time: 100 minutes

Jim: Wow, does this look gripping! I’d rush out and see it now if I didn’t think I’d spend 2 hours sitting there and getting pissed off.
Chris: I feel the righteous anger awakening.
Jessica: As great as Daniel Blake looks, I’m not really sure that I’d get much pleasure out of it. On a pure enjoyment level, I’d go with A Monster Calls. Happy New Year!

Tickets Purchased:  3 for A Monster Calls!

A Unanimous Trailer Snark Decision!
A Unanimous Trailer Snark Decision!
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Trailer Snark (December 23, 2016 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

The Trailer Snark team is taking a break for Christmas, so this week’s edition will be without commentary.  Happy Holidays!

Passengers (Columbia) – Sci-Fi/Drama/Adventure
Rated PG-13 for sexuality, nudity and action/peril
Tag Line:  Every moment counts.
Starring:  Jennifer Lawrence, Chris Pratt
Plot: A spacecraft traveling to a distant colony planet and transporting thousands of people has a malfunction in its sleep chambers. As a result, two passengers are awakened 90 years early.
Running Time: 116 minutes

Sing (Universal) – Animation/Family
Rated PG for some rude humor and mild peril
Tag Line: Auditions begin 2016.
Starring:  Matthew McConaughey, Reese Witherspoon, Seth McFarlane
Plot: A koala named Buster Moon has one final chance to restore his theater to its former glory by producing the world’s greatest singing competition.
Running Time: 108 minutes

A Monster Calls (Focus Features) – Drama/Fantasy
Rated PG-13 for thematic content and some scary images
Tag Line: Stories are wild creatures.
Starring: Sigourney Weaver, Felicity Jones, Lewis MacDougall
Plot: A boy seeks the help of a tree monster to cope with his single mom’s terminal illness.
Running Time: 108 minutes
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UvZrnt9b7vU

Fences (Paramount) – Drama
Rated PG-13 for thematic elements, language and some suggestive references
Tag Line: None
Starring:  Denzell Washington, Viola Davis
Plot: An African-American father struggles with race relations in the United States while trying to raise his family in the 1950s and coming to terms with the events of his life.
Running Time: 138 minutes

Silence (Paramount) – Drama/History
Rated R for some disturbing violent content
Tag Line: Sometimes silence is the deadliest sound.
Starring: Andrew Garfield, Adam Driver, Liam Neeson
Plot: In the seventeenth century, two Jesuit priests face violence and persecution when they travel to Japan to locate their mentor and propagate Catholicism.
Running Time: 161 minutes

Assassin’s Creed (Twentieth Century Fox) – Action/Adventure/Fantasy
Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of violence and action, thematic elements and brief strong language
Tag Line: Your destiny is in your blood.
Starring: Michael Fassbender, Marion Cotillard, Jeremy Irons
Plot: When Callum Lynch explores the memories of his ancestor Aguilar and gains the skills of a Master Assassin, he discovers he is a descendant of the secret Assassins society.
Running Time: 115 minutes

Why Him? (Twentieth Century Fox) – Comedy
Rated R for strong language and sexual material throughout
Tag Line:  Of all the guys his daughter could have chosen….
Starring:  Bryan Cranston, James Franco, Zoey Deutch
Plot: A holiday gathering threatens to go off the rails when Ned Fleming realizes that his daughter’s Silicon Valley billionaire boyfriend is about to pop the question.
Running Time: 111 minutes

Patriots Day (Lionsgate) – Drama/History/Thriller
Rated R for violence, realistically graphic injury images, language throughout and some drug use
Tag Line: The inside story of the world’s greatest manhunt.
Starring: Mark Wahlberg, Michelle Monoghan, John Goodman, J.K. Simmons
Plot: An account of Boston Police Commissioner Ed Davis’s actions in the events leading up to the 2013 Boston Marathon bombing and the aftermath, which includes the city-wide manhunt to find the terrorists behind it.
Running Time: 133 minutes

Merry Christmas from the Trailer Snark Team!
Merry Christmas from the Trailer Snark Team!